


Swimming pools and Highschools [Abandoned]

by orphan_account



Category: South Park
Genre: ??? - Freeform, Cartman's an asshole btw, Clyde can't get a girl, Craig Tucker is a good boye, Craig Tucker is a tea enthusiast, Craig has anxiety attacks btw, Craig works at a pool??, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, I write this too much??, Implied Relationships, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Sex, M/M, Mentions of drug/alcohol abuse, My First Work in This Fandom, No Smut, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV Craig Tucker, Slice of Life, Some tweek POV, They're super dramatic, This is super therapeutic, Token is such a mom, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, based off personal experiences, i'm sorry y'all, it's mostly PG, kinda based off my life, nothing super bad and nasty though, oof - Freeform, poor idiot, some of these ships are vv lowkey, super gay, they've matured quite a bit
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-16
Updated: 2018-01-13
Packaged: 2019-02-03 08:44:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 19
Words: 24,657
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12744921
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Craig-centric. Every 5th chapter will be Tweek-centric, though. Not much of the main crew. Craig's gang for the most part.The main story line will start soon, I promise. I just want y'all to get a feel for the characters and such.Main story line: rumors, hormones, relationships, bro talks, gross feelings, and working at a pool? As Craig and his friends grow up, they grow farther apart, and with spreading rumors, hormones, and relationships getting in the way, it's hard to tell if he'll even survive till college.





	1. I don't have anxiety!

**Author's Note:**

> !!! I actually write this for therapeutic reasons?? It's a slice of life fluff-ball tbh  
>  They're super dramatic in this chapter?? But that's how me and my GF are so-  
> ??  
> Feedback is welcome!!  
> Let me know if anything doesn't make sense or if there's a typo.

The last thing you’d expect was for the most boring asshole in town to be teaching kids to swim. But here he was. A swim instructor in the morning, a life guard in the evening. It was fun. Teaching kids to swim. The way their little faces light up when they get something right. There was just something so enjoyable about the little songs and nursery rhymes and such.  
So here Craig Tucker was.  
Teaching little kids.  
How to swim.  
And enjoying it.  
. . .  
>Be Craig Tucker  
>Be 16  
>Be huge loser dipshit nerd  
.  
My Red Rider alarm clock buzzed and beeped on my bed-side table as I groggily Opened My Eyes and smashed my fist down on the Off Button.  
Waking up to an alarm fucking Sucks. . I lay on my bed running my hands through my gross hair and looked up at the glow stars on my ceiling. Space. I love Space. . I took a deep breath, and in one quick move, pulled myself out of bed. My feet hit the cold floor instantly, causing all the tiredness in my posture to exit my body and crawl back in my bed where it was warm. I glanced at my clock. 5:15. Sweet. That gives me 15 minutes to get dressed and get out the door.  
I quickly stood onto the Saturn shaped rug and walked to my dresser. I threw on a sweater, my swim trunks, and sweat pants. I bunched together a pair of black skinny jeans, white ankle socks, a black t-shirt (I believe it to be my Gorillaz shirt, but don’t quote me on that), grab a towel, and push them into my red duffel bag.  
I walked over to Stripe’s cage and fed him. I pet him and mess around with him for a few minutes before glancing at the clock. I finish feeding Stripe and go downstairs.

[Bad drawing.png](https://prnt.sc/hbef8t)  **(not my best art oops)**

I sit on the last step and lace on my Red Converse Hightops.  
I pull my hat onto my head and head for the door.  
I lock the door behind me and start my way to the community centre.

...

I arrive around 6:30. Great. 15 minutes to get ready. I take my sweatpants and sweatshirt and shove them into my duffel bag. I sign in on the clip board situated on the wall, while absentmindedly throwing my duffel bag into my cubby. As I exit the staff room- front desk area with a chunk of wood with a few different sized cylinders fixed to itself. I dunk the chunk into the water, pull it out and walk back into the front office, setting it down on the counter top. I take out a bottle full of chalk-like tablets, and a small plastic vile of blue liquid.

I put one tablet in one of the cylinders, and two drops of the blue liquid into another cylinder. I wait for the chain reactions, write them down on a clip board, dump the water into the sink, and chat with my boss whom was sat at the front desk, typing away on the computer. I check my watch until I hear the familiar sound of a mother and her very hyper daughter outside the main entrance door. That’s my cue to go prepare for class. In the room with the pool there’s a bleacher for bystanders, parents, etc. On the farthest side of that, there is an assortment of kickboards, life jackets, pool noodles, and those marshmallow-esk weight lifting-looking things, as well as a few other doo-dads. On that same wall, near the deep end, is an assortment of mats. Big blue rectangular ones, as well as a few small technicolour square ones. On the wall I was leaning up against, there’s a small boiler room full of pool toys; rings, darts, balls, foam letters and shapes, etc. I grabs a handful of the colourful rings, and some of the fam letters. One of these foam letters is, however, not a letter at all. It’s a bright yellow, slightly misshapen star. It’s my favourite. I put them on the side of the pool that has the bleachers on them. This is the shallow end of the pool. It’s really great for small kids with little muscle mass.

On the side of the pool with noodles and such, there are these platforms made out of pipe. The platform part is about halfway submerged. It keeps the kids in the water, but keeps them from standing on their tip-toes. I walk over and push it into the water. I continue walking on that side of the pool the water beside me gets deeper. I grab one of the big blue mats and push that into the water. One of my students exits the girls bathroom with her mother.

Mia. Dirty-blonde, blue eyes, wearing a pink one piece with some design on it. She’s sweet and energetic. She loves swimming. Her mom looks nice. Dirty-blonde, brown eyes, long hair, Hipster-ish fashion sense, but a well-rounded personality.  
Mia babbles boisterously about something I don’t even think her mom can understand, as another of my students walk in.

Henry. He’s the one who always looks like he’s drowning. He likes to be as submerged as possible at all times. Light brown hair, Hazel eyes. Obsessed with turtles. Like seriously obsessed. He’s swimsuit as turtles all over it. It’s fucking insane. His mom looks dead inside 24/7. She’s probably single and some borderline crazy feminist who “doesn’t need a man”, when in reality she’s probably lying to herself. Red hair, Mom-fashion-sense, huge bitch, but she loves her kid. I can respect that.  
I smile.

I jump into the deep end. God I love water. I love swimming. This is great.  
As I re-surface I hear Mia exclaiming “WOW! BIG SPLASH! MOMMY, LOOK!”. What a sweet thing.  
I swim over to the eagerly awaiting kids and start the lesson.

. . .

The lesson ends at 7:30. Giving me 30 minutes to shower, get dressed, eat, and run to school.  
>Shower

My complexion is much darker than either of my parents. As a kid I used to imagine that My Real Dad was an astronaut and he left me to find another planet for us. Of course that’s not it. My mom- er- My Real Mom was friends with my dad in college. One day she called him and told him she had me, and couldn’t take care of me. My parents, having wanted a child but not really making an attempt yet, decided to take me in. Wowza.

My Real Mom is really pretty. I haven’t seen her in a few years, but that’s honestly okay. I’ve lived most of my life without her. I don’t suddenly need her. Vanessa. An Interesting name. Not the Best name. But a Good one.

I snap myself out of my head and get dressed. I steal something from the employee fridge and GTFO. I dash to school.

School. I hate school. I enter the building.

My mood drops.  
Another boring day in my worthless existence.

Trigonometry. AP US History. Gym. Lunch

>Go to Lunch  
. . .  
Lunch is a new kind of hell. One never before seen by any sane human. Disgusting slop that I don’t eat.  
I’ve noticed a pattern with my food consumption. Most food is gross. I don’t eat most food. That and exercising a lot equals a very scrawny nerd that is friends with absolute asshole dorks.

I sit down with these asshole dorks. Token and Clyde are talking about the teachers. I don’t pay attention. Kevin, Jimmy, and Tweek are discussing,,, yuh-gi-oh? I’m not really paying attention.  
The lunchroom is uncomfortably loud. It makes me nauseous. I don’t exactly know what happened but someone started a fight at a near-by table and that made everything louder. My stomach churned and the room started to spin. I cursed myself for being so stubborn. I keep telling myself that I DON’T have social anxiety. I can’t. Right? I’m not afraid to talk to people. I’m bold. Level headed. But for fuck sake. These panic attacks make me eat my words. I curl up into a ball and wish for death. I didn’t take my anxiety meds. I sure fucking wish I did.  
As I sit quietly hyperventilating, all the dread and spinning and screaming in my mind stops. I feel a hand on my shoulder. A familiar hand. Tweek.

Tweek has his hand on my shoulder. I take a deep breath and scan my surroundings. Everyone’s leaving. The lunch bell must have rang.  
I turn around and look at Tweek with a look of relief. He looks worried. Well, he always looks worried, but he looks more worried than usual. He manages a small smile.  
“You okay?” he asks meekly.  
“Y-ea, just uh, freaked out there a little,” I sound fucking pathetic, and mentally curse myself for being the weak boyfriend.  
“You- you didn’t take your meds, did you?” he asks skeptically. Fuck. He knows. God dammit. He can read me like a fucking book.  
“ugh, no,” I sigh in defeat.  
“The doctor told you that you need to take them. You aren’t stupid. You need to t-take them,” he lectures.  
“mhm. Yea I know, I know.” I can hear him hesitate. A “kcngt” sort of sound leave his grit-teeth. He’s angry. But more so than that, he’s worried. He wants to continue to scold me but he drops it.  
“Are you okay?” he breathes, “Do you want to go to the nurse? Or do you think you can make it through the rest of the day?”  
“I can do it, I’m not a baby.” I’m a stubborn asshole. God what did I do to deserve such a great boyfriend?  
“Okay that’s it I’m coming to your house after school.” Whether he’s don’t with my shit for now, or he needs to go to class is beyond me, but he has more to say on the matter. . He gave me a peck on the cheek, double checked that I was sure I was fine, and we parted our separate ways.  
. . .  
Biology.  
English Language Arts.  
Fine Arts.

Fine Arts is the best class of the day. It’s a rotating class for the artistically inclined nerds.  
Mondays and Wednesdays it’s traditional art. (Clay, or oil painting, drawing, etc.)  
Tuesdays and Thursdays it’s music. (Band, choir, orchestra, etc.)  
But Friday. Friday is free day. Creative writing, painting, orchestra, photography, you name it.  
It’s wonderful.

Today is music. Thursday. I dabble in basically everything. Flute, trumpet, and violin are my favourites, though. Today I decided to play the flute. I picked up a piece of music and played.  
That’s one of the best things about this class. It’s so free-lance. You do what you want to do. As long as you’re participating, you get good grades.  
It’s a great way to end off the day.  
. . .  
. . .  
I think it was 6th grade when The Tweak’s added ice cream and pastries to their coffee shop. The pastries are actually pretty decent, as is the ice cream. So here we were, exiting the shop of shitty coffee with rainbow sherbet on a sugar cone. Tweek got Cherry on a cake cone. We walked to my house, holding hands, being really gay n stuff. Well, we were less walking and more swinging and swaying. We were really gay, and I had to deal with a very cute, very worried boyfriend, and my ice cream at the same time. It was a little overwhelming.  
I unlocked the door to see this: Tricia and one of her dumb little friends watching TV, popcorn and chips all over the floor.

She flipped me off, I flipped her off.  
I walked up to my room and Tweek followed suit.  
I pulled my shoes off, and crawled onto my bed. I lay down with my back to Tweek.  
I could hear him sigh, a worried and disappointed sigh.  
.  
.  
“Babe?”  
“mhmn?” I mumbled.  
“Babe, you have nothing to be ashamed of,” I felt weight on the bed. His thin, cold hand rest on my side.  
“,,mhmn,,” Another sigh escaped his lips.  
“No, really. Honey, it’s just a chemical imbalance. A lot of people have it. Stan has to take meds for depression.” Oh, here he goes again with the lists of people who need meds and blah blah blah.  
“Clyde has ADHD, Butters has anxiety,” he inhales, “,, why don’t you take your meds, Craig?” he asks sheepishly.  
“mhnmnmnsmn,” I mumble.  
“I’m asking you a question,” his tone turns more serious.

I sat up, turned to look at him, and inhaled, slightly aggravatedly.  
“Because I don’t fucking have anxiety, and I don’t need some stupid fucking medication to function, Tweek. Jesus fuck why can’t you just let me be?” That was a rhetorical question, of course.  
He’s upset. I can see it in his eyes. He looks like I just killed his cat. Angry, worried, sad.  
“Because I fucking care about you and I know that having panic attacks fucking suck. It took me for-fucking-ever to get on meds for that, I had to struggle through six weeks of my life and you got put on meds after the second fucking panic attack-” Tears prick in his eyes and now I feel like shit. “-I’ll fucking force you to take those meds if you aren’t fucking careful. I care about you and know that you want the panic attacks to go away, but in order to do that you have to take your fucking medication!”  
When he starts sniffling the remorse and regret hit me like a bag of bricks.  
“Do you even fucking care about yourself? Or do I have to fucking feed you like a damn baby?” Tears. God damn-it.

 

The regret and shame are written all over my face. He’s fuming. He’d continue his tangent if it weren’t for the fact he was full-on sobbing at me.  
I cup his cheeks and wipe away tears with my thumbs and say sorry what had to be a million times.  
“Hey shh, shh, shh,” I say softly.  
“I don’t w-want you to be fu-ucking miserable li-ke I was for s-o long,” snot and tears are running down his face. He’s an emotional mess. I couldn’t love him any less for it.  
“Hey, hey, hey, listen, I’m sorry, I- I’ll make a deal with you,” I say softly, as I pull him onto my lap with his back up against me. I hold him close and rock back and forth a bit. As he calms down I fiddle with the buttons on his shirt. He wipes his face with his sleeves and takes deep breaths.  
I hate the deal I’m about to make with him but, I’d be upset if my boyfriend was torturing himself instead of getting the help and care that’s in his reach.  
“I’ll let you medicate me… if,” I trail off.  
“If?” his voice is soft and cracked. He sounds like a dying deer and it hurts so much to hear.  
“If you watch Lilo and Stitch with me,” he snorts and giggles.  
“You’re such a dork,” he turns his head and gives me a kiss, “Sure,”  
.  
.  
We spend the rest of the evening cuddling and watching Lilo and Stitch. It’s one of his favourite movies, and I’m willing to watch it for the four millionth time if it means cheering him up.

 

It’s a gross and sappy way to end the day but, hell, I’m not complaining.


	2. Friday Sleepovers and midnight showers

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> nfkdisjknmemk  
> Some fluff  
> Some slight angst   
> Don't mind me I'm just crying

>Be Craig  
>Be a huge loser  
>Be last period  
.  
Today was a good day. Friday. Craig woke up and was actually in a decent mood. Even the rain wasn’t enough to dampen his genuine content with life. The rain was incessant and didn’t show signs of stopping, but that only seemed to fuel his creativity.   
Today he felt like writing. Writing was… interesting. Writing gross sappy poems, adventure stories, mystery stories, anything. Today he wrote about the rain.  
He also wrote about Tweek.   
Yea, Craig’s a sappy little shit, you don’t need to remind him.  
. . .  
The bell rang, pulling me from my thoughts. I didn’t really mind. I was in an actual decent mood. Maybe because it was Friday, maybe because I get to sleep over at Token’s. Who knows.

Token, well,  
Token had a car. He had a nice house. A nice family. And a good deal of money.  
Token’s house was always the best destination for sleep-overs.

Yuck  
God   
That word  
“Sleep-overs” it makes me sound like a 12 year old girl.

 

Anyway, Token gladly drives us basically everywhere. He’s the chaperone to our dumb-asses. We get in trouble and make a mess, he cleans it up and scolds us. He’s like a mom, but a 16 year old boy, with no kids.   
I’m getting off track…

Token, Clyde, Tweek, and I all piled into his Ford.

I glanced at Tweek. He doesn’t do well with rain. Rain makes him sad. It always rains here in the fall. Poor guy. He’s staring out the window like when you pretend to be in a sad music video, only without the sad, poetic music. Meaning he just looks like a very sad, tired, and stressed, sulking boy, staring out the window.  
Was that a shitty way to phrase that? Yea. Do I care? Not really.

I wrap my arm around him in hopes to console the twitchy boy. He snaps out of his funk for long enough to look at me and smile slightly apologetically, before staring back out the window. This won’t do. His smile and his laugh are too cute to be hidden under all this melancholy.  
As we arrived, went inside, and threw our stuff on the ground of the uber-nice living room. Token broke the quiet.

“My parents are going out tonight with some friends for karaoke so it’s just us tonight,” he says in a voice I can only describe as casually matter-of-factly.   
“Sweeet! We should stay up and watch horror movies- oh- or we could sneak into the wine cellar~” ugh, there goes Clyde with his stupidly genius plans. (But don’t tell him I said that).  
“Uh that seems like a bad idea,” Token warns.  
“Awww come on, we won’t get _too_ drunk,” Clyde assures him.  
I can’t help but chuckle. These dumb ideas almost always get us in trouble, But I haven’t seen Clyde drunk in so long that it’s worth it. Even if it means getting drunk myself.  
“I don’t think that’s a terrible idea,” I pipe in. Tweek plops himself down on one of the sofas haphazardly. I wince a little at how glum he’s acting and plop down next to him.  
“I’ll get some blankets and shit, help yourselves to the fridge.” Token heads for the stairs. That’s Clyde’s cue to eat everything in the kitchen.

 

“Tweek?”  
“Hm?” he said before tearing his gaze from the ground. “w-what?”  
“Babe, is there anything you want to talk about or is it just the rain?”  
“I-I think it’s j-ust the rain,” he snuggled into me, nuzzling my neck. “I just can’t seem to shake out of this funk,” he sighed in frustration.  
“Aw yea, I know the feeling,” I held him close. It helps comfort him. It’s nice. I start to whisper silly shit into his ear as he snickers.

“Aw there’s my laughy boy!” I nuzzle his cheek and coo. He laughs and his cheeks dust themselves with a nice shade of pink content. 

Token and Clyde meet in the foyer, connected to the living room. They exchange looks and token dumps a shit ton of blankets and pillows into Clyde’s arms before running back upstairs to get more. Clyde throws pillows at us.

“Get a room!”  
“Fuck off,” I say in a non-threatening, bashful tone. He rolls his eyes and dumps the rest of the blankets and pillows on an adjacent couch. He helps Token with the rest of the blankets and throws one at us. I cover Tweek and myself with it and we s n u g g l e .  
Snuggling is usually very uncharacteristic of me, but Tweek makes me happy, and cuddling makes Tweek happy. I love a happy Tweek.

Token and Clyde get situated and turn on the TV. 

“Sooo, what do you guys want to watch?” Token questions. . Indiana Jones, The Spongebob Movie, Scream, Finding Nemo, and Fido are thrown about until we settle on Child’s Play. A classic masterpiece with over used jump-scares and too much suspense for its own good. Not the best pick, but decent enough. A major plus is getting to hold Tweek through it, and having to go to the kitchen a few times because he got scared. Which means, make out sessions and gross cuddles.

We’re gross. 

We went on binging horror movies the rest of the evening. 

About 1/3 of the way through The Ring, Token’s parents said their goodbyes and told us to behave.  
It was around 9:30 when Clyde suddenly got up and was absent for a good 15 minutes before returning with two bottles of wine and a bottle of Gin. Classic Clyde. . Token sighed and rolled his eyes before being handed a glass of wine. Taking a sip and returning his attention to the movie. . Clyde handed Tweek and I a glass of wine each, whispering 

“The Gin is for later…” and winking like an idiot.  
Tweek looked at me worriedly, “Don’t you think drinking this is a bad idea? W-what if his parents find out? Or we die of a-alcohol poisoning or something?”   
“Don’t worry babe, it’s all good. You don’t have to drink it, but you can if you want to,” I give him a peck on the cheek and take a sip of the oh-so fancy red wine. It was a deep burgundy. That’s about all I know about it. Don’t really need to know, though.

.

We were sufficiently wine drunk after about 2 glasses and 30 minutes. Tweek was taking hesitant sips of his first glass. I kept telling him that he didn’t have to and it was okay if he didn’t want to drink, but he seemed to have his mind set on getting at least a little tipsy. I was a little worried he felt pressured to drink, but he continued to re-assure me that he wanted to drink it.

Token takes wine like a classy lady, becoming a little more funny, and less uptight, but still keeping his composure. Clyde, on the other hand, turns into a fucking monster. Breaking things, getting more stupid, not being able to walk straight after glass one, just a general party animal. He’d fit in well with college students.  
Clyde, being the drunk dumbass he is, brought out the Gin after his second glass. Basically forcing it into my glass, and protesting that Token should have some. Token, of course declined. After all, he was going to have to be our babysitter the rest of the night.

I drank the Gin like a Man. 

After sucking it all down, I remembered why I hate getting drunk. . While Token turns into a classy lady and Clyde turns into a college frat party-goer, I turn into a bashful, soft, giggly, mess.  
Oh god.

After the movie finished, Token brought out Twister. 

The three of us played while Tweek finished his second glass of wine.  
We fell over so much. We were a big, giggly, pile of trash. Tweek giggled along with us. He was pretty drunk. Drunk in the cute way. The make-bad-decisions-but-look-cute-doing-it kind of way.

 

I dropped to the ground “oof, I can’t do this anymore. I’ll throw up,” I giggled and pulled myself onto the couch. I cuddled up to Tweek. He nuzzled my cheek and crawled up onto my lap, pulling the blanket around us. We spent the next 5 minutes bumping noses and nuzzling each other.

Clyde looked at Token and made a gagging gesture. They both snickered at us and put the Twister mat away.   
“Guys let’s play never have I ever!” Clyde blurted.  
Tweek perked up, “Yea!” I chortle lightly at his enthusiasm. . We all get ourselves situated in a circle.   
“Okay, I’ll start,” Token cleared his throat, “Never have I ever… hmm… Crashed a car,” . Clyde put a finger down. He’s a fucking insane driver, I’m surprised he’s not dead yet.  
“Never have I ever.. been … gay..” Clyde narrowed his eyes at me.  
“Okay now you’re just singling us out!” I exclaim, Tweek nods his head. We both put a finger down. . “Fine, never have I ever pissed the bed past age 10,” He gasps.  
“That was supposed to be a secret!” I laugh at the now embarrassed Clyde.  
“Well that’s what you get!” I yell. Token laughs hard enough to warrant a smack from Clyde.  
“Okay, Tweek, your turn,” Token says after calming down.  
“Oh okay uhm, Never have I ever…” he hesitated, “..had.. sex?” his voice raises.  
Clyde put a finger down. 

“Does third-base count?” Token asks.  
“uhh sure?” Tweek chirps, Token puts a finger down.  
“Hm, never have I ever.. ran away from home?” Clyde inquires; Token shakes his head, Tweek puts down a finger. I’m a little surprised.  
“When??” I cough,  
“uh, like, 7th grade. I was failing super bad and I was so overwhelmed,, I tried running away,” he sounds embarrassed.  
“I knew you were overwhelmed but.. you should have told me you needed help, or that it was that bad-“ I start on a worried tangent.  
“i-it’s fine now” he snickers, “I’m better now. And yea, I should have told you.. I just didn’t,,” he slurs.  
Token pipes in “Never have I ever broken into someone’s house,” huh. That’s a good one. Clyde puts a finger down, I put a finger down. Token gives a quizzical look.  
“I broke into Craig’s house to steal back my Indiana Jones DVD,” his voice cracks and he laughs.  
“I broke into Tweek’s house to help him sleep,” I admit.   
“Multiple times,” Tweek adds with a snort.  
“Aw you two are a serious power couple,” Clyde chimes. I flip him off. “Okay, never have I ever walked for more than 6 hours,” That was something me and Tweek had in common. We both walked, a lot. We walk wen we’re stressed, tired, scared, or just need to think. We both put a finger down. “Typical,” the fat ass scoffs.  
I inhale “Uh okay, never have I ever gone surfing,” Token put a finger down. Makes sense. He did go to Hawaii last spring break.

Tweeks turn. He’s brows knit together in thought. He looks so cute when he’s thinking. I smile like a bashful idiot. “Never have I ever injured myself trying to impress someone?” Clyde puts a finger down, Token laughs and puts a finger down, I scratch the back of my neck and put my finger down.  
“Hah, Clyde you’re out!” I exclaim. We all laugh.  
“Hey, at least that means I’m interesting!”  
“Never have I ever cheated on a test,” Token is such a goodie-two-shoes.  
“I have,” Tweek says, a little embarrassed, might I add. He puts a finger down.  
“You caught me, you caught me,” I sigh in defeat, putting a finger down. “I’m out,”  
They both laugh at me. 

“Never have I ever kissed a girl,” Tweek says, mischievously.   
“Well I’ve definitely done that,” Token laughs. “Uh,, never have I ever,, been so sun-burnt I couldn’t wear a shirt,” Tweek put a finger down. They both had one left.  
“Never have I ever,, gone sckuba diving,” Tweek smirks.  
“Alright, alright, you win,” We all cackle in defeat.

. . 

We all huddle under our blankets and fall asleep. Except the fact that I couldn’t sleep. I nudged a very awake Tweek and he turned to look at me.  
“hm?”  
“h-hey, do you want to go on a walk with me? I can’t sleep..” I whisper. He nods and smiles at me. . We put on our boots and head out. It’s still raining pretty hard but we don’t mind. We don’t talk, just walk up and down the street for a little while.  
“You look so cute with your wet hair in your face!” Tweek playfully shoves me. My face flushes slightly and a snort,  
“pft yea sure, not as cute as you, though,”   
“oh pLEASE, you are w-waaay cuter!” he slurs   
We get pretty riled up and start chasing each other in the street. We’re laughing and chasing each other like idiots. Puddles spashing, our clothes completely soaked, dancing in the rain.  
Then he slips. He howls out in pain.

I run up to him and study his shinned knee. I wince, he winces, it must hurt like hell.  
“Oh shit, we should get that cleaned up,” without listening to his response I scoop him up and carry his soaked body Bridal-Style back to Token’s house. I sneak us in and up into the bathroom. He kisses me on the jaw and I sit him on the edge of the counter. I start the shower and help him undress, as I undress myself. We kept the lights off as to not make it super awkward.  
I entered the shower first. Steam in the air, water on my face. It felt nice. Nice to get warm. To get out of those soaking clothes. I turned around to hold his hand into the shower. The water hit my back.   
My back isn’t very pretty. A few body freckles, some acne scars, not too much muscle. Being 14 fucking sucked for my body. I hit a pretty sudden growth-spurt and over the course of about 6 months, I grew a foot. A full foot. My whole body is lightly striped with stretch marks. Body acne was also really bad back then. Let me tell you, body acne Hurts. Like. Hell.  
I’m more muscular than Tweek, albeit I do swim a lot. That builds good muscle. The amount of caffeine he consumes is enough to make him shed off any excess weight. Muscle, fat, really anything. Tweek is also much shorter than I am. By almost a foot. It makes him kissing me really difficult, but super cute.  
Like don’t get me wrong, he’s not below average height, he and I are just on the opposite ends of the “normal height” spectrum. 

He’s not incredibly strong, but he’s much stronger than he looks. Like a LOT STRONGER. I guess carrying all those bags of coffee beans does something to you.  
My complexion is darker than Tweek’s. In the sunlight it’s sometimes hard to look at him. He’s VERY pale. He has more body freckles than I do. 

His hands are very much pianist’s hands. Boney, long, slender fingers. They’re shaky, but nice to hold.   
His golden blonde hair is in his face as he keeps trying to brush it out of the way.

You can’t really see it in the dark, but he has a bunch of really light freckles all over his face and it’s too cute.  
As expected his scrape stung like a mother fucker. Hand holding and me washing the shorter boy’s hair ensued.  
Also lot’s of really awkward I-love-you-but-I-don’t-want-our-junk-to-touch hugs. And lots of kisses, hair tangling in between my fingers- the whole enchilada. 

Once we were finished, we dried ourselves off. I put on my boxers, and gave my spare pair to Tweek. I pulled my shirt over my head and got him on the counter. I got out a small first aid box that I had seen Token get out many times before, with our crazy antics, I’m surprised it wasn’t empty.

I got out an anti-septic towelette and had Tweek hold my hand as I cleaned his scrape. His fingers fidgeted in-between mine. I put some bacitracin on the scrape, put one of those really big band-aids on his knee, and ~kissed it all better~.

I put my hand on his hip and kissed him.  
We must’ve been kissing for a solid minute before we tore away. His face flushes a deep shade of red. My cheeks dusted in a pink that a sunset would be jealous of. I pulled a shirt over his head, booped his nose, and we went back downstairs. We curled up in a blanket together and I think, for the first time in a while, he fell asleep before 3am.

I looked at his sleeping form, smiled, kissed the top of his head and drifted off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ;)))))))  
> Let me know about typos n shit
> 
> I'm gonna at a photo later on-  
> That I drew >:)))  
> but my internet suck rn-


	3. I rewrote this one mkay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I rewrote it  
> I wasn't happy with it  
> here

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's vvv short plz don't kill me

Snow. We awoke to snow.

Clyde was ecstatic. Like it was the first time seeing snow in years, even though there’s snow in this shitty town 7 months out of the year.

Anyway, Token suggested that we eat breakfast first, which usually got Clyde focused on food, but not today. He practically dragged us outside. Me and Tweek exchanged looks and giggled.

 

Token sighed, rolling his eyes. “Whatever, I’m having breakfast, you guys don’t die of hypothermia while I’m gone,” he said in a groggy already-done-with-shit tone.

 

Clyde, being Clyde, didn’t care much that is was freezing out and he was only in his PJs. He frolicked around this winter wonderland, throwing snow in the air and beginning to make a snowman.

I turned to look at Tweek impishly, “So when we have kids, you don’t think you’ll get tired of this?” I’ll admit, thinking about such things did make me blush a little, but I don’t think he could tell.

He first smiled and shook his head respectfully, “I don’t think I could ever get tired of seeing children, especially my own, so happy,” then what I had said dawned on him. He blushed furiously and scrunched his nose. “Aaa- ack- I- uhm- aaah,” he was very much caught off guard. I giggled at him, and wrapped my arm around him.

Looking at Clyde in an almost proud-parent-oh-hey-look-at-our-off-spring-is-super-happy sort of look, I say in a cool, confident voice “I’d love to see our kids like that,”

He’s very caught off guard, but as he manages to calm down, he leans into me and says in a soft, warm voice, “yea, that’d be nice,”

.

“Do you want to go out and join him now?”

“Hell yea,”


	4. Swimming and drowning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> oH MY GOD TWEEK

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I edited the last chapter to fit with this one better so re-read that one first ;)

>Be Craig

>Be after church

>Fuckchurch.png

>Be fucking around with friends

>Be having a snowball fight

..

I put a rock in the snowball I threw at Clyde.

I don’t regret a God damned thing.

He ended up with a huge bloody nose. Not my problem. Token took him home and I ceased this as an opportunity to take Tweek swimming.

 

 He wasn’t the biggest fan of swimming, nor was he the best. He probably would have turned it down if it weren’t for the fact that I’m not only a life guard, but also his very caring boyfriend.

I met up with him halfway to the pool and held his hand the rest of the way.

Tweek wore olive Green swim trunks. Mine were plain black. I jumped into the deep-end, meanwhile he crawled down the latter /very slowly./

What a cutie.

We splashed around and kissed underwater. What can I say? He’s just too cute to resist for so long. I was having Tweek withdrawals.

We fought with the pool noodles and tried to keep balanced on one of the small square mats. We raced each other across the pool. I won, saying as I had built up muscle for this already.

He was having an actual fun time, which doesn’t happen often. But I guess swimming for 2 hours straight is a lot on a weak boy like him. I was grabbing more pool noodles, when I turn back, he’s gone. I go and jump in immediately and practically drag him up to the surface. I guess he got tired and his body turned to auto-pilot. When he realized what had happened, he freaked out and we left. He was hyperventilating the whole way back to my house.

I knew this wasn’t good. Basically the second I close the door, he screams at the top of his lungs. It isn’t loud enough to alert the neighbours, but it’s enough to make me cover my sensitive ears.

He started pacing and ranting loudly about all the possibilities and it didn’t take long for him to start crying. Whether it was because he’s happy I saved him or because he brushed so close to death, is up for debate. Then it started getting really bad. He started scratching himself hard enough to leave marks. I had to hold his wrists, which only made him freak out more. He thrashed and clawed at me and screamed and sobbed for almost an hour straight. He returned to pacing and ranting before breaking down sobbing again.

Poor thing. It always hurts so much to watch him like this. It makes me want to curl up on the floor and cry. I just want to wish it better. But I have to be the strong boyfriend, and I have to help my boyfriend.

The more he rants, the less his words are actual words. He just starts rambling in gibberish. This is when I have no clue if he’s scolding himself or giving himself death threats or what. Which is one of the scariest things. The unknown.

He worries me too much. He starts to finally calm down and I think I can touch him without panicking.

Now we’re making progress.


	5. The panic attack

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> anskf nasjkfdsnjsdan  
> soz  
> ilu

>Be Tweek Tweak

>Be just after swimming

>FeelsBadMan.jpeg

..

Tweek sat on top of Craig’s dryer with his knee’s to his chest.

His panic attack had just finished up 15 minutes ago. His very lovely boyfriend, was very used to these panic attacks. He knew how to deal with Tweek more than Tweek knew how to deal with Tweek.

Craig knew how to ask if he could touch Tweek, if he wanted to talk about it, he knew how to hold Tweek, how to calm him down, how to tell him everything was alright in such a manner that Craig couldn’t possibly be wrong.

. .

Today’s panic attack wasn’t subtle, however. It lasted over 2 hours and consisted of screaming, thrashing, crying, and lots of hyperventilating.

Craig had rubbed circles into my back as he sang syrupy sweet lullabies in my ear. The vibrating of Craig’s throat and chest distracted me just enough to get me to pay attention to Craig’s voice. It wasn’t anything like Kenny’s (and trust me that’s not a compliment) but it calmed me. His voice is, and always has been a bit deeper than most of his peers, this was nowhere near a downside ;) , and added more charm, and,,, well,, distinguishability to his voice. You could always spot his nasally voice in a crowd, which proved to be useful.

“Stars and moons, and fear-filled balloons, float, way up in the sky and,

The atmosphere makes them Pop, and sometimes that can really suck,

But once it’s over, it’s gone forever, and you’re a stronger person, afterall.

Stars and moons, and space men go flying, out, out, of the horizon, and,

Don’t you worry, they’re trained for this, they know what to do,

 maybe they’ll get stuck,

or maybe they just suck,

Either way, I’ll keep you safe tonight~” It doesn’t rhyme and follows no understandable train of thought but it’s just so-

Correct? It’s definitely something Craig came up with on the spot. It suits his character quite well.

,,,

Back to the present.

My hair is even more wild than usual. And it smells of chlorine. When it’s left wet it get’s curly, so the ends curl up just enough to make Craig weak in the knees.

Craig folds clothes on the washer as I sit, in a towel. We got back from swimming, so that’s what’s /in/ the wash, currently. As he finishes folding the assortment of clothes, he grabs the clothing that’s his and quickly takes it to his room, puts it away and dashes back to me, as to not leave me alone to my thoughts for too long.

Craig is covered in scratches, as am I. He looks so beat. So tired. But he’s powering through. I don’t know how he does it but I admire him even more for it.

He looks disheveled. His hair going in all directions, a chlorinated tangled mess. It hurts a little to look at. Worry is written all over his face. I feel bad, but as he kept telling me, I put up with him being an asshole, and in return he puts up my panic attacks. Of course he said it in a nicer way. One filled with love, and not just ‘Putting up with each other’ but that’s the only way I can describe it at this point.

I was exhausted at the pool, so a 2 hour panic attack just drained any energy left in me.

“We should probably shower,,” he says, haphazardly.

 I just nod.

“Are you sure you’re okay with that?” He asks very cautiously.

I nod again.

We shower in the dark. It’s kind of our thing at this point.

He holds me and rocks me back and forth a bit and washes my hair. I’m so exhausted at this point I’m hardly still on earth, and Craig isn’t helping by being super cute.

His chest is pushed up tightly against my back as he hums and sways us. He peppers me in kisses washes himself off.

We dry off and get to bed.

. . .

Here I am, sitting in Craig’s bed, wearing one of his shirts that’s just a bit too big, with some pajama pants that are too small for him, but fit me perfectly, and some wool socks.

His room is so cute. It matches his personality and childish day dreams perfectly. That’s an interesting thing I’ve noticed. The room you live in shows off a good bit about your personality and mental state. Based off of Craig’s room, which is decently organized, not perfect, but plenty neater than mine, I can come to the conclusions: He likes space, he’s a pretty chill guy, gets shit done on time, doesn’t like a lot of mess, but isn’t perfect. All of that is pretty accurate.

My room is very messy. As is my mental state and personality.

Clyde’s is, well, annoying to look at, and very trashy. He’s not the best in the head, he never gets stuff done on time and is good at breaking things.

Token is very neat. Very wealthy. Very good at tuning things in on time. Obviously, he has more important things in his life than cleaning, though.

Kenny’s room is shit. His mind is shit. His personality is shit. He’s a shitty person.. His family is shit, he’s barely getting by in school, and he’s probably going to be a drug dealer because there’s nothing else for him here.

My tired mind shifts subjects with no ulterior motive.

But Craig, oh, my Craig, he is just the most wonderful in the whole wide world, isn’t he?

He’s so cute, and way his eyes get squinty when he smiles real big. He smiles around me, a lot. He says my smile is infectious. He’s constantly commenting on my freckles, which he constantly says grow in number with each summer, and how when we first got together I didn’t have any, like I was a blank canvas, and now time was “painting me up like a doll” as he put it. He says a lot of weird things. And he capitalizes random words. Some people don’t like it, and some kids used to bully him about it. Of course, Craig being Craig, didn’t let that bother him.

Personally, I think it adds character. He’s got quite the personality, and those just add to the list.

I’m snapped out of my thoughts by him rubbing my arm.

“Tweek? Honey? You still alive?” I nod tiredly.

He smiles and sighs, “Oh, babydoll, I’m never letting you go swimming on 2 hours of sleep again. You scare me so much,” he makes a sort of pained chuckle, “Oh, sweet heart, you’re safe with me, don’t you worry, I’m never letting that happen again,” he pauses, “Let’s get some sleep, okay, Tweekers? Everything’s gonna be just fine, just breathe, Babyboy,”

He wraps me in blankets, then in his arms. He hums more and kisses me everywhere.

All his pet names make me die inside, He’s too cute, but I’m so tired I can’t even talk at this point, all I can do is blush. I snuggle in and gather up the rest of my strength and motor skills to whisper a rather meek  “I-I love you,”

“I love you, too, sweet heart,” and with that, I’m fast asleep in my boyfriend’s arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here >;))
> 
> Some more edge will follow with the other chapters I upload today and tomorrow ;))  
> Ilu
> 
> Also follow my twitter @Ruby_Can_See_You for updates, art, etc. !!!! <33


	6. Why is Stan here?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> mhmmm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THERE'S SOME TEXT FIC IN HERE AHAHAH  
> I'M DEFINITELY GONNA MAKE A TEXT FIC FOR THESE CHILDREN >;))  
> Follow me on Twitter for lots of a r t :000  
> @Ruby_Can_See_You
> 
> I'm also uploading a shit ton of chapters tonight because aaaaaa

>Be Craig Tucker

>Be at work

. . .

I walked in, checked the pool’s pH and such with the cylinders (those damn cylinders, man), Sign in on the clip board. My boss speaks up, tearing me from my mindless routine.

“We have a new coach-in-training. He’ll be shadowing you for the next week, okay?” she says in a don’t-be-an-asshole tone.

“Uh yea sure,, who is it?”

In walks Stan Marsh. Fucking Stan Marsh. God fucking dammit. This is the worst possible thing.

He walks in with a small smile on his face. Sometimes I forget what people look like without their winter-wear on, so seeing his short black hair was a nice kick in the brain. The boss lady “introduced” us to each other. Pft. Yea sure. Whatever.

“Oh, so I’ll be shadowing him?”

“Mhm, just to help you get used to things. He’ll show you how to work his magic,”

Fuck this. I hate this. This sucks.

I showed him around and showed him how to choose toys, and why I chose the toys for class. I tell him about the kids and watch as they slowly pile in. We get them into the water and practice Back-Floats. I show him how to hold them. Hold the back of their head, keep it as far back as possible (it helps keep their back straight and their stomach up) and I tell them to keep looking at the stars. We practice glides and then fuck off and have fun for a while.

“That was fun!” He sounds genuine. He’s so annoying.  I can’t wait to get to school and get him out of my life for the day.

Quick shower, and running to school to avoid Stan from trying to talk to me anymore than humanly possible.

I meet up with Clyde at the front entrance and he talks about how he totally got to 3rd base with Bebe last night.

“No you fucking didn’t you god damned liar,”

“No it’s true! I did!”

“Yea I’ll believe that when I’m dead,”

We met up with Token at his locker and Clyde continued to demand that we believe him. God he’s such an annoying cuck sometimes.

I honestly don’t know what was wrong with me, but everything was so much more annoying than usual. Even Token was annoying me, which doesn’t happen often. He’s the only fucking sane one in this group. Lunch was uneventful, just stupid rumors and more of Clyde spewing nonsense bullshit. It was getting to the point that I was fed up enough to sound like a total jackass to Tweek.

I could see the hurt in his eyes, but I was just so fucking done with today that it didn’t even register.

I went home and slept that a very grumpy sleep that night. Next thing I know, I’ve awoken in a cold sweat, and I’ve realized what I said. The memory floods back to me and I wince at what I had said.

“I don’t care, Tweek. Seriously, just fuck off,” I had said it in such a venomous tone, too, which only added insult to injury.

I felt terrible about it. It hurt my stomach and made my head spin. I quietly pulled my shoes on, and snuck out. God I hope my parents don’t find out I snuck out at 2:30.

I practically sprint to Tweek’s house, which is a decent distance from mine.

Tweek, being the paranoid little angel he was, always left a latter under his bedroom window so he could climb out, and it had proved to be useful on many occasions.

I crawled up and held my breath, listening for anything.

Sniffles and a few choked sobs. Oh God.

I pull up the window and crawl in. He’s lying there, in bed, staring at the ceiling, trying not to sob, holding his hands over his chest for dear life. I walk up to him and coo at him.

“Hey- hey, baby boy,” He snivels and starts crying more. “Oh baby, God I’m so sorry, I- I was so-“

“Go away,,” he mumbles between tears.

“I fucked this up, babe, shit I’m sorry. Just uh- just hear me out, I was having a shitty day and I snapped, it didn’t even fucking register until a little while ago. Baby boy, I’m so fucking sorry,, I-“

“You said you didn’t care, you told me to fuck off,,, I-,, fuck that hurts so fucking m-much, Craig,,”

“I-I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” I touched his hand, it snapped up and grabbed my wrist, pulling it tight. It hurt. His grip is uncomfortably strong. I yelped. He pulled me into his bed and laid on top of me, holding me tight, sobbing into my chest. All I could do was comfort the poor thing. I rubbed circles in his back and hummed until he calmed down.

“I- I,” he struggled to put his thoughts to words,

“How did I make you feel?” Ah, feeling exercises. They may seem cheesy and annoying, but they’re super helpful, especially when it comes to my Tweek..

“Terrible,, like I was just another one of the shit-head kids at school, o-or like I hurt you and you’d been holding a grudge on me, or like I broke your h-heart or something,,” he spoke in long, quick, run-on sentences.

“Oh, that’s so awful, what do you want me to do to make this feel better?” this exercise always called for a bit more animation to my voice, but it always helps get his brain flowing.

“Help me sleep,, please,, I’m so tired,, but I’ve been so stressed and upset all night,” he pleaded. I sighed.

“No but really, Tweek, I’m so fucking sorry, I didn’t even think about the fact that I was speaking to the love of my life, my sun, moon, and stars, and I fucking suck at this relationship. I’m so lucky to have such a wonderful boyfriend who will put up with my attitude,” I say genuinely, dropping the animation in my voice. I probably sounded like a dying rat.

I peppered him in kisses and wiped all his tears away and slept with him. I snuck out the same way I got in and we walked to school hand in hand.

. . .

“No, no, no, you’re doing it wrong, duh,” I tried to keep my composure, ya know, for the kids.. “Stan, you have to hold their neck and head like this, if you hold up their stomach they’ll never learn to do it on their own and they’ll never develop the muscle,” I continued. He nodded and made a couple “ohh”s.

Mia splashed us and we splashed her back. It ended up with a full on water fight between me and Stan, and the kids. They won.

.

We got them onto one of the big blue mats and pulled it into the deep-end. We had them sit on the edge of the mat and glide to the wall. At the end of class we spun the mat around and played with them before sending them off. I gave Stan a glance,

“So, when are you leaving my class?” my voice was laced with an attitude that would have made most mother’s smack me.

“Uhhh, end of this week, I think?” he smiled at me. I rolled my eyes and headed to the showers. “Don’t let them drown~” I chided.

. . .

“Do you Take Tweek Tweak to be your lawfully wedded husband?”

“I do,”

“You may kiss th-“

“CRAIG!” I snapped awake, “No sleeping in class!”

“Sorry,” I said sleepily, rubbing my eyes. My teacher was such a flaming asshole sometimes. I took a deep breath and collected my thoughts when it hit me… my dream-

Oh my.

I shook my head and giggled as I felt the heat rush to my face. I’m such a sappy loser.

As class came to a close, Clyde walked over to me,

“Hey man, you wanna come to my place after school?” He hummed.

“Uh, with the guys?”

“Uh actually I thought it could just be you and me, you know? Bro time? There’s some stuff I think we should talk about, okay? Just- don’t be a huge ass,”

“Uh ok-“ he cut me off,

“Meet me out back after school,” With that he walked off and left me to recover from that. I was curious about why he sounded like we needed to discuss why I was cheating on him or something. I shrugged it off and went to my next class.

. . .

“So just- dude. You’ve been such a flaming asshole- I mean, you’ve always been a huge dickbag but, you’re just being worse than usual lately, I guess,”

I shrugged. “I dunno man, puberty does weird things,”

“No I mean beyond hormones and shit, you’re just like- such a jerk, like, we used to be best friends, what happened to that?”

I sighed. I haven’t really thought about that in a while. “Uh, I don’t know, man, it’s just weird, me and Tweek are in a super serious, long-term relationship, school is kicking my ass, I guess I’m just,,, tired. It’s not like we’ve done memorable shit in a while, or anything worthwhile. Plus you constantly being obsessed with any girl that breathes gets pretty tiring.”

“Yea man, you’re not much better,” he laughs, “You’re constantly with Tweek. He’s like, the only thing that makes you happy anymore,” he pauses, thinking, “Is there, like, anything going on? Anything you want to talk about? Because I’m here for you,” it was cheesy, he was cheesy. But he /is/ my friend.

“Not really dude, but um, I’ll think about that. And uh, I’ll try to not be such an ass?”

“Thanks, I appreciate it,” he smiled, “Bro hug?”

“That’s gay-,”

“/You’re/ gay,”

“True,” we exchanged a super no-homo hug and played video games all afternoon.

. .

I lay in bed thinking about what Clyde had said and started to realize he was right. I mean, I’m a huge ass, and I enjoy watching others suffer but, I guess I forgot that all the poking fun at my friends and being a huge ass to them had stopped being out of brotherly love and more out of frustration.

I guess we’ve all been huge asses to each other. Highschool does that to people. Along with rumors that can permanently damage your image, it’s pretty tough having and keeping friends.

I started to brainstorm about what has changed.

Oh! We stopped fucking around town going on little adventures. After Clyde crashed his car that time that only Kevin could hang out, we stopped running around on our little escapades. At least for the most part. We still ran around town just being stupid together, but those were less adventures and more just being huge dipshits together…

~

<Craig Tucker started a group chat>

<Craig Tucker added *I’m Not Your Mom*, *Ladies Man*, and *Tweet Tweat* to the group chat>

<Craig Tucker changed *Ladies Man*’s name to *Single Pringle*>

<Craig Tucker changed his name to *Craig Fucker*>

<Craig Fucker is typing…>

Craig Fucker: Tweek, you’re taking us on an adventure tomorrow after school.

Craig Fucker: Bring an overnight bag and rugged supplies

Craig Fucker: we’re going camping out in the middle of nowhere

Craig Fucker: AKA we’re huge nerds who are going to play Zombie Apocalypse all weekend

<I’m Not Your Mom is typing…>

Craig Fucker: no, you can’t get out of this for any reason. We need this. Bro time.

<I’m Not Your Mom is deleting…>

Tweet Tweat: ?

Tweet Tweat: In my beat-up pickup truck?

Craig Fucker: Yes.

Tweet Tweat: that old thing hardly works

Craig Fucker: But it does work.

Single Pringle: He’s got a point

Tweet Tweat: Fine, but if it breaks down, I’m eating you first

Single Pringle: kinky

Craig Fucker: with pleasure, my good man ;)

I’m Not Your Mom: holy shit

I’m Not Your Mom: Clyde get the camera-

I’m not Your Mom: Craig just used an emoticon-

Single Pringle: MY BOY IS GROWIN UP SO FAST-

Craig Fucker: >:((((

Craig Fucker: angery

Single Pringle: This is the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen-

Tweet Tweat: Craig open your window

I’m Not Your Mom: W H A T

Tweet Tweat: ;))

<Craig Fucker sent an image>

<[TweekWTF.png](https://prnt.sc/he2ydy)>

Single Pringle: I’M YELLIN

I’m Not Your Mom: HA HAAHA

I’m Not Your Mom: TWEEK WHAT THE FUVK

Tweet Tweat: I’m here to LOVE MY BOYFRIEND

Tweet Tweat: I L O V E YOU

Craig Fucker: !!!!!

Single Pringle: jiodfzmkoosNEDSNSFDSDKFKDNFDAK!!!!!!DFKNFEJK!!!

I’m Not Your Mom: Okay Clyde, we get that it’s cute but, please speak English.

Single Pringle: JIFDKSMAJSN

<Single Pringle changed his name to *Creek Is Love*>

<I’m Not Your Mom changed their name to *Creek Is Life*>

Creek Is Love: YES

Creek Is Life: DOUBLE YES

Tweet Tweat: you guys are unbearable..

<Craig Fucker is offline>

<Tweet Tweat is offline>

Creek Is Love: oh my

Creek Is Life: I hope they use a condom

~

. . .

I wake up to Tweek nuzzling my neck. I can feel his smile as he softly plants kisses all over my neck and jaw.

“Come on, silly, we have school~” he whisper-purrs.


	7. Road trip?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This ones p long

>Be Craig Tucker

>Be after school

…

Tweek pulls up out of the school parking lot with the very ugly 1993 Toyota pick-up truck. It’s a rusty red colour, with some of the paint peeling and chipping. The apulstery is probably the nicest thing about the car, and they re-apulstered it 10 years ago..

We all pile in with our overnight camping gear, some food and water, matches, blankets, cool knifes, and Clyde brought a pistol. Clyde didn’t have a permit for this pistol, or any registration papers, hell I don’t even think it was his. This pistol was bad news from the start, but he insisted on keeping it on his person at all times.

Tweek turns around to look at me and Clyde as he buckles his seatbelt,

“Buckle-up, boys,” he says mischievously.

He speeds out of the parking lot and we’re off. Driving towards nowhere in particular. An old beat-up two lane road, reminiscent of Route 66.

Something interesting about Tweek is that his driving is the absolute opposite of his personality. He’s doing 75 on a 50mph road. He’s scarier than Clyde but he’s also better at driving than Clyde, which is good.

We drive for a few hours, passing small town after small town, avoiding cities and highways.

In my mind I’m picturing this as a movie scene. We’re driving through abandoned towns filled with the undead.

It was in a filter that made everything almost black and white. The lack of vibrant colours would make you sad, and help you feel the main character’s inner-turmoil and unease, as well as help understand the gravity of the situation.

I was snapped out of my fantasy world point-of-view by the car pulling into a gravel clearing on the side of the road. It was dark. Clyde was asleep next to me, Token and Tweek exchanged hushed conversation in the front seat. Occasional passing headlights and the constant soft blue glow of the car radio were our only sources of light. The clock read 9:47pm. We had been driving in the dark since about 5:30. It didn’t feel like very much time had passed, though.

Token took a deep breath and opened his door, stepping out. Tweek soon followed suit. They talked out there for a good 10 minutes before they put what they must have been talking about into action. They pulled a bunch of blankets out of their bags and laid them on the truck-bed. They reached into the car occasionally to grab pillows or more blankets that were tucked into bags or on the floor boards.

The cold, winter, nighttime temperatures chilled me to the bone, and caused me to sit there uncomfortably while trying to get my brain to get my body to move. Once my brain finally grew the balls to control my body again, I slung my bag over my shoulder and opened my door, closing it behind me as I shivered violently. Not even the extra layer I put on could protect me from the bitter cold and uncomfortable breeze.

“Oh, hey,” Tweek said in a voice with an undetectable emotion. Maybe it was a common emotion I just hadn’t learned about yet, or maybe it was just that indecipherable. How I can describe it is quiet, peaceful, uncomfortableness. Like a loving mother getting her child to wake up to go to the house after a long day of traveling from Grandma’s house which was in a different state.

“Hey, where are we?” My voice cracked from my dry throat.

“Uh, just outside of Dinosaur*,” he continued to lay down blankets. Token laid down the last blanket he had in his arms and hopped down. *Dinosaur is a town near the edge of Colorado.

“I guess Clyde is sleeping in the car?” he says almost rhetorically.

“Heh, yea I guess,” I snicker. Token reaches into his bag lying on the ground next to the rear tire, pulling out his sleeping bag and a bottle of water. He throws me the bottle of water and crawls back into the now nest of blankets and pillows. He opens his sleeping bag, takes off his shoes, being careful to place them at the opposite end of the truck bed, and hunkered down.

I took a few big gulps before tossing it back to him. He pushed it back into his bag and rolled over, pulling a blanket on top of him.

Tweek crawled in with his sleeping bag next. But he sat on top of his and stared off into space for a while as I searched my duffel for my sleeping bag. He stare off into the direction we came from.

I pull myself into the cradle and set my sleeping arrangement up. I reach up to the hood of the truck behind us for the flashlight and turn it off, tucking it in Tweek’s bag.

Me being as tall as I am is both a blessing and a curse. Today- or tonight, rather- was a curse. My legs had to be bent just slightly enough that it was uncomfortable, just to fit into the truck-bed properly. The silence usually makes me nauseous, but tonight it felt different. It was silence filled with good company. I felt safe. I was with people I cared about. It was comforting. The silence was soft and mellow. Enough to make me extremely drowsy.

I start to question why we didn’t decide to go to a motel, but after pondering that thought, it made more sense in a zombie-apocalypse situation to end up sleeping in uncomfortable places.

Tweek’s shaky breaths were there to remind my half asleep self that I wasn’t in my bed at home.

“Do you think we could run away? Like we just never come back?” Tweek asked, with a raw, quiet voice. “Do you think they’d miss us? Would it shake the town horribly? Would they put up missing person posters?”

“I don’t know, man,” I shook my head and looked at him concerningly, “why?”

“I want to run away,”

“Like all of us?”

“Or just us 2, doesn’t matter either way, I just want to escape before I find myself working at my parent’s café the rest of my life,” he breathed and pulled himself into his sleeping bag.

I pondered his questions and pulled a blanket over top of us. I pulled him close to me and we huddled for warmth.

“I love you, Tweek,”

“I love you, too,” I nuzzle him and readjusted the blanket.

“Goodnight, kitten,” I purred softly.

“Night-night, space man,” He said tiredly, yawning and snuggling against me. With that I drifted off into a cold, uncomfortable, dreamless sleep.

. . .

I woke up to Token shaking my shoulder.

“Come on, man, we’re going to I-Hop,”

I sat up and rubbed the sleep out of my eyes. “What?”

“Hurry up! I want pancaaakeesss,” Clyde whined.

“Alright, alright,,” I pulled myself begrudgingly out of my sleeping bag and stretched my sore muscules.

“How’d you sleep?” Token asked as I pulled myself into the car.

“Not great, I don’t fucking fit in the truck bed,” he snickered and shoved pillows and blankets onto the floor boards.

..

“-And what can I get for y’all today?”

“I’ll have the Belgian waffle combo,” Token said in a Mom voice.

“Uhh Oreo Cookies & Cream Stuffed French Toast!” Clyde chided.

Tweek nervously grabbed my hand and held it tight. “I’ll uh,,” he looked around, “I’ll have the Strawberry banana pancakes, please,” His voice faltered like his life depended on his answer.

I took a deep breath and confidentially stated “Buttermilk pancakes, please,” my voice and posture was quite the opposite of my sea-green eyed boyfriend. The waitress smiled at us.

“And any drinks to get you started?”

“Just water,” Token says politely.

“Orange Juice pleeassee,” Clyde says with a hyper attitude.

“Uh,, c-coffee,”

“Green tea,” My voice sounded rather dainty. I was calm. I was happy. I was sore, but I was surrounded by my friends. This was nice.

“Sure thing! I’ll be right out with your drinks,” She chirped and ran off.

It was probably around 6:30? So the morning rush had yet to start. It was too fucking early to be going to Ihop, but never the less.

“So why’d we do this?” Token inquired.

“Uh, you know, to get us closer, we’ve been distant lately,” I cleared my throat.

“Oh, huh, doesn’t seem like something you would do,” he chuckled.

“I agree,” Clyde chimed in, “But I think we need this,” he smiled at me. I smirked and winked back. He stuck his tongue out, mockingly.

.

Our food arrives and we eat and chat like old college buddies meeting up after 10 years. I forgot how much we stopped talking. Then something terrible happens.

We start talking about rumors we’ve heard. Now usually I’m all about ruining people’s lives. But there have been a few rumors that have affected too many of my close friends.

“No no no, Clyde shut the fuck up,”

“Aww come on,”

“No, rumors are terrible to spread, what if you’re next?” Tweek nods, knowing all too well what rumors can lead to.

“Alright, fine, sheesh, you don’t gotta be a baby about it, all I was saying is that Heidi probably gave Cartman-“

“STOP,” I retorted. He rolled his eyes.

“Both of you guys shut up and lets enjoy the rest of this weekend,” There goes Token, being the mom as always. Tweek nods and I let out a deep sigh. I finish off the rest of my pancakes and we head out for the car.

We drove farther and farther away from south park until we found ourselves in Utah.

Utah was much different than Colorado. Less green and snow, and more red and dust.

It wasn’t until a few hours after sundown when we realized we should probably head back. We were probably an hour away from Salt Lake City and decided we wanted to see it before we returned to Hell™

The city was full of bright lights and some college kids getting drunk. Wow. Someday that would be us.

That’s so crazy to think about.

The city wasn’t empty. It gave off a totally different vibe than South Park.

South Park was dead to the world as soon as the sun goes down. It’s so empty. It hurts your heart if you pay too much attention to it. Feels like broken dreams and empty promises.

Salt Lake City felt like adulthood. Suddenly neon lights and all nighters. It was so interesting. Salt Lake was full of opportunity and spunky kids.

We drove around the City, in the dark. We stopped at a gas station and switched seating arraignments. Token got in the back and I got to ride shotgun.

I peppered Tweek with kisses and we were off, back to home we go.

Highlights, streetlights, store lights, it all hurt in a poetic way.

Staring out the window like the main character of a music video. Mine and Tweek’s hands fumbling together. Glancing at each other and smiling. Clyde drifted off to sleep and Token exchanged quiet talk until he fell asleep.

I was used to staying up all night with Tweek, or to look at stars, or just general insomnia.

I was very snug in my seat. And warm inside from Tweek being adorable in his little way. We made light-hearted banter before getting tired enough we couldn’t even manage that. He turned on the radio to some alt station and sang along to some of the songs, in which I couldn’t recognize until I heard a few familiar notes. We both smiled and blushed.

_“Hey there, Delilah, what’s it like in New York City? I’m a thousand miles away, but girl tonight you look so pretty, as you do, Times Square can’t shine as bright as you, I swear it’s true,”_

I snorted. “Wow, I forgot how sappy I used to be,,”

“Aw you’re still plenty sappy, you’re my sappy boye,” He smiled.

That song was one of the first ones I sang to him after we got together for real. A few weeks after we were in a real relationship, not a fake one. I sang Hey There Delilah to him and he proceeded to kiss me a thousand times and we cuddled like cute little idiots.

“I love you, Tweek~”

“Pft- Yea, I know, you nerd,” our fingers tangled and I pulled his hand up to my lips and sang quietly along to the song. I pecked his and as he giggled profusely.

Eventually he was worn out to the point he wasn’t comfortable driving.

We pulled over into a parking lot in the middle of nowhere. I pulled a bunch of blankets and pillows from the floor boards and threw then into the truck bed. Once the nest was to my standards I pulled Tweek in and we snuggled in sleeping bags and blankets.

With one less person in the truck bed, that left more room for my l e g g s

I fell asleep with a sleeping, smiling boyfriend huddled to me for warmth, with his face shoved in my chest.

We woke up around 8 and I spent 20 minutes kissing Tweek because !!!!!! AAAAAAA!!!!!!!

I LOVE MY BOYE!!!!!

HIS S M I L E

HIS L A U G H  
THE WAY HE B L U S H E S

I hugged him until he basically died. After the !!! thing, we got the stuff out of the truck bed, and once again, shoved them onto the floor boards. We drove to a Denny’s and ate before everyone got out of church. We basically drove all day.

We listened to music and talked about school. We talked about old friends and new friends. Token talked about his trip to Hawaii last spring break. We talked about college.

That of course led to the big question.

“What do you want to be when you grow up?” Clyde said in a mocking-the-adults tone.

“I want to work for a nice company and get good pay. Find a nice wife and settle down,” Token said confidently. God that was one of the amazing things about Token. He had his shit together. He knew what he was going to do. And his goals didn’t sound stupid and far-fetched. His dreams were respectable.

Mine were mockable.

“I guess I want to be a film student, take some music classes and acting classes on the side. Maybe a SFX makeup class or something like that. I’ll make independent films and probably work at subway..” I said shrugging. A boring life for a boring guy, I guess. Nothing more nothing less.

“I-I’m probably going to end up working at Star Bucks or something, haha, but I want to study U.S. History and music,” Tweek said nervously. His dreams were so dull and sad. I’d make sure to spice up his life when that sort of thing happens.

“Well /I/ want to be a computer engineer,” Clyde said matter-of-factly, smiling.

“Pft good luck with /that/,” Tweek laughed at his far-fetched dream.

“Did you forget you have to have good grades to be an engineer? Because they don’t take kids with C’s,” Token warned amusedly.

“I think you can do it if you try hard enough,” I chided.

Everyone turned to me in disbelief. I shrugged. “Whaat?”

“Wow, Craig Tucker said something positive,”

“That’s kind of terrifying,” Token shivered dramatically. I rolled my eyes and flipped them off.

“Oh, fuck you, I can say what I please,” Tweek giggled at me and kissed my hand.

…

We drove and drove. It was decently late when we reached South Park. We dropped off Clyde, then Token.

We passed my house. I didn’t say anything. We did this so often I didn’t need to feel uneasy about it. As long as I wasn’t fucking Mr. Tweak’s “son in the bed I bought for him” we’d be okay. I texted my mom just so she wouldn’t worry. She doesn’t really mind that I go to my boyfriend’s constantly, and that he’s constantly at my place. She understands young love, and she knows we’re not ready for sex, so she doesn’t have to worry about finding out her 16 year old son has Syphilis or something.

~

You: Hey mom, I’m sleeping at Tweek’s house tonight. I’ll see you tomorrow.

Mom: Okay, ILY!

You: I love you, too.

You: Night.

~

Satisfied, I crawled into Tweek’s bed and put my phone on his nightstand. He crawled in after me and snuggled up against me and the wall. I ran my fingers through his wild mane. His hair wasn’t tangled, it just had a tendency to constantly look like he just got out of bed, which I don’t mind too much.

His bed wasn’t the most comfortable bed on the planet but it sure felt that way. 2 days of sleeping on some shitty blankets made sleeping in a normal bed feel like I was in heaven. Feeling the tension and soreness release from my back was really nice.

I looked to my small boyfriend. His messy hair suit him so well. He looked so nice with his hair combed back, too, but that’s what my mom always says about me, so by default I must immediately take back that statement. (I can’t let her be correct >:C )

He nuzzled into my collar bone and fell asleep, creating a tiny puddle of drool. I snickered and drifted off to sleep. Thinking of Gay Aliens and Tweek.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter!!! Includes lots of angst!!! And Kenny is a drug dealer??? Oops??  
> Underage marijuana consumption warning!!!  
> As Markiplier said "[I don't] condone the smokage of any herbal substances"  
> ;)


	8. Kenny feels bad

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hhhhhh  
> It's a lil short?? SOz  
> weed  
> angst  
> hhhHHHHHHNNNGGG  
> Craig has a panic attack next chapter  
> aLSO I'LL BE WRITIN A LIL KENNY/BUTTERS FIC THAT EXPLAINS WHY KENNY LEFT SO SUDDENLY AAAAA

>Be Craig Tucker

>Be reuniting with long lost pals

>What Clyde said really made me think okay jesus fuck stop laughing at me-

>Seriously, I see you smirking at me thinking “aww my boy is so sentimental and cutteee” STOP IT

>angerey.mp3

….

Here I sat, outside the back of the school, at 4pm, next to Kenny, getting high.

Due to Kenny’s uhm,, low income upbringing, he’s had to get money in ways that he doesn’t find morally right. Drugs are one of them. So here we are, smoking a $20 blunt, behind the school, talking about deep shit.

Unlike most of my friends, Kenny actually talks about deep deep shit. We talk about how this town is a dead beat with no opportunity.

“I just worry I’ll end up being stuck in this shithole making minimum wage or living off of welfare for the rest of my garbage existence,” I nod, I can see where he’s coming from.

“Yea man, I always think my life is a dead end but jesus, your life is a whole other story, but I believe in you, man, even if it means running away or something,” he snorts at me,

“Yea fat chance, I gotta keep my little sister with me and I don’t think running away with a little girl is a smart idea,,” he pushed me playfully and took another drag.

“Damn man you’re in a pickle,” we both laugh at the usage of the word ‘pickle’.

My phone buzzes in my pocket and I pull it out.

~One message from: Tweekers <3~

Tweekers <3: where are you????

You: Oh heyyy babe

You: I’m just hangin out with Kennyyy

You: Why?

Tweekers <3: we were going to do homework?

You: ooohhhhh

You: yeaaaaa

You: I’m probably not going to be able to do that..

Tweekers <3: Why?????????

You: I’m hangoing out with keeennnnyyyyy

Tweekers <3: oh god

Tweekers <3: I’m going to find you and hit you >:((

You: I looovvvee youuuu

Tweekers <3: >>:(((((((

~

“Who you talking to?”

“Tweek, I think he’s ~caught on~ to me,”

“oof rip you. He’s gonna kick your ass,”

“Yea, well until then gimme that shit,”

“So anyway, I’m just fucking worried that I’m never gonna find a good job,”

“Uhm, I know somewhere you might like?”

“Really?? Where??!?”

“Uh the pool, I work there, it’s uh $20 an hour, so at least $5 more than minimum wage,”

“Sweet! What do I have to do?”

“Uh life guard and swim lessons,”

“Shit I’m going to look into that,”

“It’ll be nice to see you there, dude,”

“Shit man I should probably get going,” he takes one last hit and hands the end of it to me, “See ya, dude,” A bro-hug commences and he’s running for the hills, I chuckle at him. I finish the blunt and head for Tweek’s house.

I snuck into Tweek’s room, as to not be confronted by his parents.

“Where were you??” he whisper-yelled at me.

“Behind the school with Kenny,” I smiled at him apologetically.

“Oh, GOD, seriously? You got high with Kenny?” He isn’t a huge fan of me getting high. He seems to be okay with it if we do it together. Maybe he’s worried about me. Maybe he’s just jealous I got high with Kenny instead of him. Maybe he made me promise not to get high or something. The most likely case though, was that he gets extremely over-protective when I’m around Kenny. Maybe It’s because he’s a bit too much of a flirt for his own good, and the fact that we were both intoxicated might have made Tweek think that we would,,, fuck? I have no clue why Tweek would think that, but whatever.

“Maaayyybeee,” I flopped down onto his bed.

“I can’t believe you,” he started a tirade “You’d rather get high with Kenny than do homework with me??”

“Sheesh calm down, I forgot, okay? You don’t need to be jealous,”

“Jealous??!?? I’m not jealous, I’m mad that you’d just go off and do whatever, and of all things, GET HIGH WITH KENNY,”

“I’m your boyfriend, not your 8 year old son, I don’t need to tell you where I am at every consecutive moment,”

“GOD you are so unbearable sometimes,”

“So are you,”

He paused,

“Take that back,”

“No,”

“Take it back you asshole!” his nose scrunches up in anger.

“No, If you’re gonna be an over bearing controlling boyfriend then I’m not into being your boyfriend,”

He paused, he thought about what he said. He took a deep breath.

“I- ,,,, fuck off,”

“Fine,”

“FINE,”

I left.

We have fights sometimes, but this was a pretty bad one.

I wasn’t worried though, I knew I was right, HE knew I was right. He just didn’t want to admit it. So for now, we’re on hiatus. I have no doubt in by mind. He’ll apologies by thanksgiving. I’m confident.

. . .

Okay I’m slightly less confident. I know I’m still right, but It’s been a week. A week of him sticking up his nose and sitting somewhere else. He’s been hanging with some of the girls more often. They’ve been giving me dirty looks too. I worry that he has brain-washed them into thinking I was at fault. I’m not! …Right?

. . .

I’ll admit, getting dirty looks from everyone for almost 2 weeks, and not having my boyfriend on my side was kind of getting to me.

Sitting at lunch was hell.

“Yo what the fuck is up with everybody?” Token inquired.

“I dunno, I guess Tweek’s just really good with making girls think our petty quarl was a huge deal,”

“Dude that fucking sucks,” Clyde responded.

“Can you guys like, maybe talk to him? I’m worried about him,,” I said while looking at my macaroni very intensely.

“Yea man, I’ll see what I can do,” Token smiled reassuringly. Clyde nodded.

After lunch Token and Clyde bumped into Tweek in the hallway. It didn’t go well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aAAAAAAAAAAAA  
> do not hurt me please  
> I am fragile >:Ɛ
> 
> Double upload tomorrow :000


	9. Yayy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> some angst and fluff >;)
> 
> it's kinda short oops

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm working on the Thanksgiving chapter right now  
> it should be up by 9pm PST  
> <33

>Be Craig Tucker

>Be very not confident that Tweek was coming back

>Fear.png

…

This was all getting to me. I was freaking out. Everything was already terrible, but I forgot my anxiety medication…

Why wasn’t he coming back to me? Was I in the wrong? Did I fuck everything up? Is this how it’s going to be the rest of my life? Did he hate me? Did everyone hate me? Was I going to be shunned by all my friends? Was everything going to be terrible forever? I should have taken it back.

Token and Clyde tried to get me out. I wouldn’t budge. They even got Kyle to try and get me out, but to no avail.

“Hey man, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have let you chill out back with me,,”

“No no, he’s uh- I-I think he’s just o-over reacting, it’s not y-your fault, Kenny,” he made an apologetic wince at me.

“Dude, are you okay?”

“If I’m being honest? Not really. Everything is just kind of in shambles and I’m overthinking and uuugghhh. I’m so tired of all the girls staring at me like I killed their cat, and rolling their eyes whenever I shrug,”

“Woah dude, do you want to, like, go home or something? Is there anyway I can help?”

“No I think I’ll be okay, thanks, though. I appreciate it, man,”

“Yea no problem. Just let me know if there’s anything I can do,” He ran off to his next class and everything got uncomfortably dizzy and dark. I felt like throwing up.

I trudged to the bathroom and curled up in a ball in one of the stalls.

Going between crying and hyperventilating all through lunch. Token and Clyde tried talking to Tweek again. It didn’t work out. They came around to try and comfort me, or get me out of there, but I wasn’t budging.

They even got Kyle to try and get me out, but to no avail.

After that everyone just kinda left me alone. I continued to overthink the situation and contemplate what life would be like.

Would all the girls hate me forever? Would Tweek give me dirty looks? Would Tweek share my embarrassing secrets? Would he write a whole book?

Would I find Someone Else? Would he find Someone Else?

Would he think about me positively or negatively?

Will he be kept awake remembering what my hair smelled like and how weak he felt under me? Would he remember the taste of my lips? Would he remember the way I swung my hips to his shitty music at 2am? In the dark, both our hearts would beat together as one. Will he find another one?

Would he ever want me back? Would he miss the feel of my hand on his back and my nose on his neck? Would he ever love me again? Would he ever think about me in bed? Would he ever wish he’d taken me back? Would he regret the things that he said? Would he regret the things that he said?

I just need to know every detail of our lives. I just want to know if things will be alright.

I just need to know if his lover would treat him right. I just want to know if he thinks of me at night.

Is that too much to ask?

Is that too much to wish?

Because I just need to know that he’ll be okay.

Because I just want to know that he’ll be safe.

I just have to know what our lives will be like. I just gotta know will everything be alright. Alright? Will I be alright? Alright? Will he be alright? Alright? Will things all be fine? Alright? I’m not alright..

..

..

Then I heard someone enter. I looked at their shoes and knew who it was.

Lime green converse that I convinced him to get. He thought they were too flashy, but I got him to wear them. They looked so nice on him, even though they were so worn out at this point.

The way he sighed made my chest tighten.

The way he fiddled with his shirt made me feel shy.

The way his voice cracked still hurts me inside.

“H-Hey, babe? I’m sorry- you were right,”

I unlocked the door and tackled him in a hug. “I fucking missed you, you jerk,”

“I missed you, too,” he mumbled.

“I love you,” I coughed.

He pulled away and looked at me. He cupped my cheeks in his hands and wiped away my tears.

His sea-green eyes inspect every inch of my face. My dull blue eyes counted all his freckles and my hands tangled in his hair. I smiled at him.

My smile was weird. It made him snort. He always said it looked so adorable but so unnatural. “The braces just make it even more laughable.” He had said. My smile looked so awkward, but it didn’t look forced, which was nice.

A twinkle in his eyes made me feel like everything was going to be okay. My knees buckled, and he planted far too many smooches on my face. We laughed and booped noses.

We hid in there, cuddling and giggling and apologizing until school was out. We got notes from Token and booked it to Tweek’s house.

We ran up to his room, hurriedly did the dumb homework and got me caught up on what I skipped and played halo 4 on his PS3.

We snuggled under a blanket and played all evening.

Sometimes relationships are really weird, but it’s all worth it in the end.

Before I knew it, he was asleep. I turned off the PS3 and carried him into his bed.

I saw paper out of the corner of my eye and a thought came to mind. I started mumbling the words softly as I wrote it down, with some base and ukulele cords and shoved it into my backpack. I crawled into bed with Tweek and fell asleep remembering the taste of his lips.


	10. Thanksgiving

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tweek-centric!!! Decently long, too.  
> Enjoy!
> 
>  
> 
> Craig likes writing songs??? Shh don't tell Tweek ;)

“Are you sure you’ll be okay alone?”

“Yea mom, don’t worry about me,”

“Okay, call me if you need anything, we should be back on Sunday,” She kissed my forehead.

“Okay, mom, bye,”

“Bye,” she closed the door quietly behind her.

I made sure they were gone before I texted Craig.

~

You: Eyyo they fell for it

Love of my life: Sweet!

Love of my life: I’ll swing by in a few ;)

You: See you then <3

Love of my life: <3

~

I had been brainstorming all through lunch on Monday as to how I was going to get out of going to Virginia for Thanksgiving when it struck, a sore throat. The sore throat was because of singing and dry weather, but just a little bit of lead up, and over reacting was enough to make my mom let me stay home.

Now I was free all of Thursday, Friday, and the weekend.

Craig and I had planned to use this time to watch movies and fuck around together.

The knock on the front door prompted a “coming!” from me as I jumped up, grabbed my bag, shoved on my sweater, and ran down the stairs.

I opened the door to a familiar tall smiling boy. I zipped my sweater up and he took me by the hand, leading me to his house.

We didn’t say anything. Just walked hand-in-hand to his house.

The bitter cold nipping and my cheeks and nose, the wind swaying my hair in a way the Craig says makes me look like I belong in that “Teenage Dream” music video. God, he was so sappy.

The cracked sidewalk matched the old neighbourhood well. When my family moved into South Park when I was 4, this was all new development. Craig’s neighbourhood was built when his parents were around our age. All the houses in the town looked so worn down and beaten up. There was a new development in the works, but it probably wouldn’t be habitable until we were long gone.

Grass grew in the cracks and potholes on the old cement and houses needed new paint jobs and new roofs. Some of the houses had already been remodeled, but knowing the people of South Park, most of the houses would have to be literally falling apart for the owners to fix them up. My house got a new paint jobs around 6th grade, so it was very worn in. It no longer stood out as if it was neon green in a sea of black.

The wind licks at us as we walk, Craig’s windbreaker and my sweater are the only things protecting us from this. I glance at him.

His eyes are all squinty. They get like that when he’s somewhere deep in his brain. He looks so cute. The way his brows furrow in concentration, like he’s trying to find the right words to say. I squeeze his hand and he looks at me and smiles like an absolute dork.

“You’re so cute,” he gushes. I blush and bite my tongue, smiling.

“You’re cuter,”

“No, you,”

“nO, YOU,” we nudge each other and laugh. We stumble up the steps of his house and he funbles with the key. We enter and sigh, aaaahh warmth.

“Oh! Hello, Tweek!” His mom exclaims from the kitchen.

“Hello, Mrs. Tucker, thanks for having me over,” I smile politely at her.

“Oh it’s no problem, and please, call me mom,”

“o-okay,, mom..(?)” I say in an amused, unsure tone. She chuckles and puts the turkey in the oven.

 “Tricia, cut the vegetables, will you?” ‘Mom’ says slightly disgruntled, a very unenthusiastic ‘yes mom’ comes from the young girl as she shoots up from the couch and towards the kitchen. I glance at Mr. Tucker, who is watching some college basketball game. We walk over and Craig plops down next to his father. I stand next to the couch, unsure of where I want to be. Mr. Tucker pats his son on the back and chuckles,

“You’re gonna be one of them someday, aren’t you, sport?” He nudges his son.

“Yea something like that..” Craig rolls his eyes. His dad always wanted him to do some sort of sport. Craig isn’t the greatest at basketball, but he’s good enough that his father sees potential. Craig, of course, doesn’t want to play basketball. He wants to be a film student. He’s not easily pressured into things, so I doubt he’ll actually get a scholarship on basketball.

Craig is actually better at baseball than at basketball. He also likes baseball more than basketball. He looks cuter in a baseball outfit, too. Basketball outfits /look/ like they stink. Baseball on the other hand, has tasteful outfits, more formfitting. And the striped pants make his butt look cuter >;P

I wonder over to the kitchen. Tricia looks up at me and her eyes get all squinty in a menacing way.

She stops cutting vegetables to point the knife at me.

“Don’t you ever fucking hurt my brother like that again, or I’ll cut you up, bitch,” She whispers.

I nod vigorously and back the fuck up before I get smacked the fuck up.

I walk back over to the couch and Mr. Tucker pushes Craig off the couch.

“How about you two go throw the basketball around for a while. I’ll call for you when dinners ready,”

Craig groans and leads me out.

We toss the ball into the hoop in front of his garage. Or rather he does, I suck at it. I always miss. He giggles at me.

“Here let me help you,” he stands behind me and puts his body up against mine. He puts his arms over mine and helps me hold and throw the ball, shooting a perfect hoop. He chuckles and we highfive.

We throw it around for almost 30 minutes when Tricia opens the door and yells “dinner!” before retreating back into the warmth.

We go inside with no reluctance. Mr. Tucker is cutting the turkey and the girls are getting the table set up. We sit down, say grace, blah blah blah.

“This is really good,” Craig says with a face full of food. Tricia nods in agreement.

I eat small bites and play with my food a bit. I’m not a huge eater. It’s good, but not good enough to stuff my face full. I have more dignity than that.

After dinner Craig and I retreat to his room.

We play smash bros for a while and cuddle because aaaaaaaa

A knock on the door and a “Come downstairs when you’re done fucking so we can play Jenga,” caused both of us to laugh.

We turned off the console and ran down.

“Oh my GOD, YOU’RE GONNA TIP IT, STUPID!!!”

“Shut up, Tricia I got this in the ba-,” the familiar sound of Jenga pieces crashing down can be heard. The black-haired boy groans as his sister yells at him.

I laugh at them. Their dynamic is so cute. They’re always in a standoff but if someone hurts their sibling, they’re going to lynch a mother fucker.

We play a few more rounds before calling it a night.

Tricia and Mr. Tucker stay up to watch some holiday movie. Mrs. Tucker cleans the kitchen.

“You boys go hang out, just be safe,” she winks.

“UUGHGHGHGHGHHHHHHHHH MOOOOOOOMMMMMM,” Craig groans embarrassedly.

I giggle and we go up to his room. His door is covered in alien stickers and a diamond shaped sign that says “Warning Low Flying Aircrafts” he stole it when he was in Montana a few years back.

[((((((Craig is a smiley boye))))))](https://prnt.sc/hejm4a)

His room is dark, with only a lamp to light up the room. The glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling “Remind me of your freckles” as he said.

We curl up in his bed and talk.

“Remember when you broke your arm and I fed you carrots?” He giggles,

“Yea, you didn’t have to feed me, I have two arms for a reason,”

“I know~”  

“Remember when you stayed up for 4 days straight and fucking K.O’d in the middle of class?”

“Oh, haha, yea, that was terrible,”

[((((((TWEEK DOES A HECKIN LISTEN))))))](https://prnt.sc/hejn9d)

“I was so worried about you,,” his voice turns sad.

I kiss him on the cheek, “Yea, but remember how you slept with me and my insomnia got a lot better?”

“Yea,,” he smiles, “Yea that was the first time we slept in the same bed,”

“Yea it was,” I smile, remembering the fond memory of a foreign arm wrapped around my waist. The wave of comfort that was brought with his body curled up against mine. It was such a new thing at the time. Before hand it had just been hugs and the occasional awkward kiss. Sleeping next to someone brought on a whole new type of comfort, as well as admiration for the person.

Now we were so used to each other and the ways we slept and moved that we practically did it in unison. I nuzzled his neck as he giggled. I gazed over his features and blushed. He’s so pretty. God, I love him too much for my own good.

“Your braces are cute~” I coo.

He snorts and blushes. My heart does backflips.

“Remember when we beat the shit out of each other?”

“Pft yea, that was so weird,”

“You’re very strong,”

“So are you,”

“Hm, nah,”

“Hm, yah,”

“Whateverrrr,”

..

..

“Remember when Kevin broke your nose?”

“Yea, that fucking hurt, my nose is still fucked up from that,”

“Well I think it looks beautiful,” he smirks at me and kisses my nose. I feign anger and stick my tongue out at him.

..

“Remember when you broke your Gameboy because you threw it at Mr. Mackey?”

“THAT WAS FOR A DARE,”

“But you DID it, that was the most unbelievable thing ever,”

“Yea, everyone at school thought that was fucking crazy,”

“People told me I was rubbing off on you,, but I don’t really think so,”

“Hm?”

“I mean like, we got together because I made you feel like you were stronger than you thought you were, and I feel like I’ve continued to do that to you. I haven’t rubbed off on you, I’ve helped you grow as a person,”

“..yea,” I said, in awe at what he said. I thought it over and smiled. “That’s actually,,, really smart thinking,”

“Hehe, thanks, honey,” we smiled at each other and bumped noses.  
..

“Remember when Cartman was an asshole?”

“When was he not?”  
“Good point.”

“Remember when Cartman invited us to his sleepover and we went?”

“Kind of?”

“We watched gay porn,”

“What-,”

“Yea, he basically just played gay porn on the tv until we left,”

“Pft- that’s such a Cartman thing,”

“I know, right?”

I yawned, and he glanced at his Red Racer clock.

“Shit it’s late, we should sleep,”

“Since when has sleep ever stopped us?”

“Since always, now sleep before I kiss you to death,”

“Night, dweeb,”

“Night, nerd,”

. . .

I awoke to a very awake Craig staring at me.

“Good morning~” he whispered.

“H-how long have you been awake?”

“Uh maybe two hours?”

“Oh my God, Craig what have you been doing this whole time?”

“Looking at you,”

“You’re disgustingly sappy,”

“I know~” He pecked my cheek and we got out of bed.

We clamored downstairs for breakfast, which was homemade pancakes. My bare feet hitting the cold wood stairs, and then the cool linoleum. My hair was messy, and I was ready for a shower.

I plopped down at the table and munched delightedly on my pancakes.

After breakfast Craig and I roamed town, hand-in-hand. The cold was even worse today but that didn’t stop us from walking around like newly-weds. We talked about random things we remember happening around town as we walked.

“I remember one time I snuck out in the middle of the night and danced in the rain over there,” I admitted, pointing to a street corner.

He laughed, “I used to do that a lot,”

As we walked, the memories seemed to get sappier and more embarrassing.

“I beat someone up over behind that dumpster,” Craig pointed to a dumpster behind a nearby shop.

“Woah, who??”

“Uh I think it was this kid named Conner? I’m not sure though. All I know is I was pissed. He beat up Tricia,”

“Awwwww,”

He flipped me off playfully.

We walked around the town sharing more memories.

“Aw dude, I had my first kiss on this bench,” He exclaimed as he ran up towards it.

“With who?”

“Red,”

“Nice,”  
“Yea, she’s a sweetheart,”

I nod.

“Not as sweet as you, though,” He winked at me. I grinned.

. . .

I shivered, and he glanced at me, then to where we were, then back to me.

“Let’s go to your house,”

“Why?”

“Your mom’s bath is really nice,”

“Yea, it is,”

“Let’s use it,”

“Okay,”

. . .

“MORE BUBBLES,”

“TOO MANY BUBBLES,”  
“NOT E N O U G H,”

“YOU’RE JUST EMBARASSED,”  
“NO I’M NOT,”

“YES YOU ARE,”  
“NO-,”

“THAT YOU CAN-,”  
“LALALALALA I CAN’T HEAR YOU!!!!”

He busted out laughing as I held my hands over my ears.

“I’M A C H I L D,”  
He laughed more,

“I DO NOT NEED TO S E E,”  
“YES YOU DO,”  
“NOPE NOPE NOPE I’M NOT LISTENING LALALALALA,” my face was flushed as we both sat in the bath tub, covered in bubbles. Once I heard him wheezing I unplugged my ears and poured my bubble bath in.

“AAAA I’M DROWNING, SAVE ME,”  
I hold my hand out to the overdramatic ‘drowning’ Craig,

“BUT FIST YOU HAVE TO LOOK AT M-,”  
“N O P E LALALALALA,” I cover my ears again, laughing and blushing,

“YOU’LL HAVE TO SOMEDAY,”  
“BUT TODAY IS N O T THAT DAY, HONEY,”

He starts laughing again.

“DO NOT  T E S T  ME,”

“I WILL IF YOU AREN’T CAREFUL,”

“LALAL ALALALAL LLALALLALALALLA I CAN’T H E A R YOU,”

“I’LL SAY THE WORD,”  
“DO N O T,”  
“D-,”  
“n O,”  
“D I C C,”

I scream.

He starts turning bright red from laughter.

“ARE YOU A L L E R G I C TO THAT WORD??”

“y ES,”

“DICK DICK DICK DICK DICK-,”

I scream again, and laugh.

“DICK DICK DICK DICK,” a pause, he has to break out into laughter a few more times before he can manage to yell “P E N I S,”

“REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE,”

We laugh ourselves half-to-death and have to stop before we suffocate.

After sufficiently catching our breath, we enjoy the bubble bath we have found ourselves in.

After our hands start to get prunny I announce,

“I’m getting out, and you are closing your eyes,”

“Don’t be such a prude,”

“sHUT UP-,”

“Alright, alright, relax,”

I shoot him a glare and he covers his eyes with his hands. I quickly jump out of the tub and run for my towel.

As I grab and sling my towel over me I hear him mumble “nice butt,” I shriek and exit the room at a speedy pace, slamming the door behind me. I can hear him busting a gut laughing. I stomp to my room and dress myself.

. . .

He knocks on my door as I sit on my bed, brushing my hair. “Come in,” I say in a rather unamused tone.

He comes in- get this-

With a towel BARELY wrapped around his waist. I curse him under my breath and avert my eyes. I’m a huge prude but aaaaa

This shit makes me very uncomfortable. V E R Y  U N C O M F O R T A B L E

HE  K N O W S  THAT

AAARRGGHHHH

He rummages through my drawers until he finds clothes that ACTUALLY FIT HIS T A L L N E S S.

WHICH IS D I F F I C U L T

HAHAH S U F F E R

He pulls on boxers which I never wore, sweat pants that were left here by him, and an oversized shirt that he gave me. After being sufficiently clothed, he walks over to me and flops down on my bed, staring at me, with a shit-eating grin.

“KnFGh- fuck you-,” I scowl at him, pink dusting my cheeks.

“I love you~”

..

“And you butt~”

I throw a book at him and he falls to the floor laughing.

“You’re so cute when you’re flustered,” he cooed.

“Shut up, asshole-,”

We laughed at each other for far too long.

Once I calmed down and he stopped teasing me, we watched movies and he doodled things on pieces of paper, making sure to hide them from me. I figured it was something that was either super embarrassing or just something he wasn’t comfortable showing me. So I respected that and left it be. He hummed as he wrote, which was adorable.

A while after the movie finished, I was sitting on his lap as we made out. We were gross ‘n sappy and after an embarrassing day to be alive, he was ready to make it up to me in the form of MELTING ME FROM THE INSIDE.

SERIOUSLY

KISSING THIS BOY IS LIKE DRINKING LAVA

ONLY IT’S W O R T H  I T

My hands tangle in his hair as I pull off his hat. His hat was cute but he was cute enough on his own. The way he tried to hold back a huge grin every time we kissed just made this relationship feel so.. genuine.

You could tell that it wasn’t fake, and that no one was unhappy. He was very content with being my boyfriend, and that made me so happy.

The way his hands rested on my hips just felt so right. His hands weren’t like, abnormally sized, they were just like,, NORMAL hands, I just have very thin hands, so it feels very different, and very comfortable. He would sometimes play with the edge of my shirt and I didn’t really mind.

This is the part in all of the music videos where they strip down and fuck, and yea, as much as that 8% of myself wanted that, and the 10% of him wanted that, we were moth fully content kissing.

I’m 98% sure we’re going to fuck before College, but right now, that’s just not what we want, nor what we need. And that’s okay.

I’m not ready. He’s not ready.

He want’s it to be special.

I don’t want it to be just because we’re horny.

It needs to mean something. Something more than just mutually fulfilled pleasure.

God I sound like one of those “WAIT TILL YOU’RE MARRIED TO HAVE SEX OR YOU’RE GOING TO H E L L” but it’s more that we just want it to be right. No rushing into it, we want it to be respectful, and well thought out.

 

We both pulled back to breathe and he got caught in my eyes, he smiled and I felt him get all shy.

He’s overwhelmed by what he sees

‘A mosaic, a masterpiece’

I feel this, and I don’t know why:

When he’s like this I feel so strong.

I shove my mouth against his, It’s kinda rough but he doesn’t mind. He does this to me all the time.

Is this ecstasy?

Can this last forever? God, please, yes. I need this, yes. I need this to last.

He’s my Space Man, I’m his Alien bride.

I’m mysterious and his smiles so nice. I wish I could see it all the time.

That’s my job, isn’t it? Make him smile, until we see fit to tie the knot and settle down? I just don’t ever want to see him frown.

God, I love this boy, so so much.

We kiss a little rough. I feel his smile. I wish this could last forever. Maybe I can make it happen every day.

No, then it wouldn’t feel quite the same.

But I remind myself to dominate more ofte-

I MEAN MAKE OUT WITH HIM MORE OFTEN HAHAH-

. . .

I curled up on his chest and he pulled my sheets over us.

“Goodnight, baby boy,”

“Goodnight, babe,”

He kissed my forehead and I dozed off, thinking about Space Man Craig wooing his Alien boyfriend as I show him all the stars. God he’s good at playing with my heart.

. . .

I wake up, it’s still dark.

I’m alone in bed, but I can feel his presence in the room.

He’s writing.

And mumbling words in a melodic way. I’m too tired to interact and I quickly fall back to sleep, but I can here the faint words

_“In your smile, you hold the cure,_

_In your hair, holds my saving grace,_

_The angels sing about your pretty face~”_

That’s all I hear before I fall back to sleep. I awake once more, at least an hour later, judging how much time I felt pass. He was under me again. I question whether I dreamed up that first part, but I’m pretty sure I didn’t.

. . .

 

I woke up with my face in the crook of his neck.

“Morning, baby boy,” he cooed, lightly. He brushed the hair out of my face and I looked into his Crystal blue eyes.

“Your eyes are so pretty,” I slurred, sleepily.

“Mine are boring, thank you, though,” he cracked a smile.

I stuck out my tongue in protest.

“Your eyes, on the other hand,, wow~” He got all star-gazey at the end of his sentence. Trailing off into love-struck dork territory. A simple kiss on the lips snapped him out of it.

“G-od, I love you so much,,”

“I love you, too, cutie-pie~” I cooed, and he blushed.

“hng- you’re so pretty~”

“Not as pretty as you, Star Boy~,”

He giggled and sat up.

He ran his hands through his hair and pulled himself out of bed. He left the room to, what I assume he was doing, collect his things.

He returned with his windbreaker and shoes on. He plucked his hat up off the ground next to the bed and pulled it over his head. A few tufts of hair peeking out underneath it.

He walked over to the spot on the floor where he’d been writing in the middle of the night, shoving the papers in his pocket.

I stretched and got out of bed. I pulled socks, shoes, and a green sweatshirt on. He waited patiently for me to be ready and once I was, he wrapped an arm around me and we headed back for his house.

..

Today wasn’t as cold as yesterday but there was fresh snow on the ground. We strolled leisurely to his house.

Upon arriving, unlocking the door, and entering (as well as him slamming the door behind us, making me jump a bit) I found that the house was empty. As if reading my mind, he calmly states,

“Dad’s at the bar and the girls went to the mall,”

“,ah,,” He led me to the kitchen. I sat on one of the bar stools and he made some tea.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm writing the next chapter rn which directly follows this one, only in Craig's POV >;)))  
> aLSO  
> Expect more shippy stuff between the oTHER ships I mthrfkn tagged  
> also I might spin this off with a text fic that is slightly more centered on The Boys  
> also I'm starting a bunch of oneshot drabbles that tie into this fic but didn't quite make the cut to be a full chapter in this  
> ;))  
> I'll link to those when they happen!  
> <33  
> kudos and cOMMENTS are appreciated! There's nothing that brightens my day more than a heckin comment :'000


	11. Some drunk boyes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They get drunk >:(((

>Be Craig Tucker

>Be a weekend of loVING YOUR BOYFRIEND

>Be making tea

 

“What tea is it this time, Tucker?”

“Orange peel. It’s got hibiscus, lemon, ginger, pineapple, mint, and a few other things in it. It’s really sweet, you want some?”

“Uh, sure,” I smiled fondly at my lovely boyfriend.

I handed him a mug of the stuff.

“No sweetener? No milk? No nothing?”

“This tea is perfect in its own. Drink this tea like you do coffee, you hoe,”

He stuck his tongue out at me and took a sip. His face turned to delighted surprise.

“Oh wow this is perfect on it’s own,”

“Told ya so,,” he giggled at me.

I sat next to him and we drank our tea in comfortable silence.

I finished first.

That sounded far too sexual but-

Oops.

I just consume sustenance faster than he does. It’s always been that way.

I look at him fondly as he stares off into space.

I tuck a lock of hair behind his ear and he smiles at me, taking another sip.

He sets the empty cup down on the counter and looks at me.

“What do you want to do?”

He shrugs.

“Movies, cuddling, uhh,” I brainstorm aloud, “We could clean, bake, draw, do music stuff, film,” He perked up.

“Let’s do music!”

I chuckled at his enthusiasm and we went into what used to be my dad’s office when he used to work from home. Now it was a bit cluttered, but a grand piano and my sister’s violin were in there among other things.

He sat at the piano like second nature. He started plipping away. I smiled at him. He was so good at that.

“One second,” I proclaimed before running up to my room to get my Bass.

I ran back down with a beat up white electric Bass. I plugged it into the amp, which was hiding under a pile of clutter. I plink away, creating a nice low vibe, as his piano goes to a higher tune.

We jam out for far too long before he stops.

“My fingers are tired now,,”

“Mine, too,” I sigh and turn off the amp, carefully placing the Bass next to it.

I wander out of the room, and he follows suite.

I find myself opening the liquor cabinet and pulling out a bottle of Whiskey.

Jameson’s Irish Whiskey, aged 60 years.

It’s pretty strong stuff.

Tweek doesn’t even protest. I hand it to him and he takes a big swig.

After a few gulps we’re both sufficiently schnockered.

I put it back in the liquor cabinet and we fumble up to my room.

He sits on my lap and we make out with Lilo and Stitch playing in the background. We taste like Whiskey, but we don’t mind. His hands tangle in my hair. My hands trail under his shirt. The kisses get rougher and rougher as time goes on until we find ourselves at a crossroads. Either have sloppy not-ideal sex, or watch the movie.

I mean, I could have settled for a hand job, but he’d regret it in the morning. I don’t want our sexual endeavors to be a morning after embarrassment.

I just don’t want to put him in that situation.

We lighten up slowly and cuddle as we watch more Disney movies until the sun goes down. I hear mom and Tricia come in through the front door, but I’m too occupied with a half asleep boyfriend on top of me to really care.

We fall asleep in a fluff pile of drunken glee.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> jfdsioekwds  
> It's so short I'm so sorry  
> this one and the next chapter are vvv short, longer ones should be expected on Saturday!  
> I'm also starting a bunch of drabbles and oneshots so it you wanna see those, they're on my profile.
> 
> Follow my twitter for art  
> @Ruby_Can_See_You


	12. vv short Clyde and Craig bonding time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kdfjshfndas  
> I bad at this sorry  
> I wrote this instead of sleeping oops

>Be Craig Tucker

>Be filming

>Be at mall with Clyde

…

I pointed the camera as he narrated something stupid about the peons down below, from our second story view of the mall.

“And over there we see a whale in its natural habitat, Mc Donald’s,”

We both hold back a snicker.

“Over there we can see a mother with her 6 kids. I wonder how many baby daddies she’s got,”

“I wonder how she hasn’t killed herself yet,”

We both laugh.

We fuck around with the camera some more before leaving.

“Ah, good times man, we’re gonna look back on these in college and think that we were absolute retards,”

“Because we are,” I joked.

“yEa trUe,” his voice cracked comically. We caught a bus back to South Park.

. . .

We found ourselves in my room. I was editing a previous video, and he was playing smashbros. Newsflash: He was losing.

I sat there in my rocket ship pajamas and chamomile tea in a cute mug.

This was nice.

It would be nicer if it was Tweek, of course, but we all make sacrifices.

Me and Clyde chatted about random shit. It was nice. We don’t do this enough.

“We should probably redo scene 3 part 2, it was a little out of focus,”

“Whatever you say, man,”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oops
> 
> expect longer chapters this weekend and some neck sucking >;)


	13. Smooch ft. Craig thanking God for not getting a boner

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Why did Tweek take Kenny's advice? We may never know  
> NECK KISSES AAAA  
> tbh this is more lewd than a oneshot I wrote that actually included sex  
> ???  
> no sex though
> 
> also, why does the title of this chapter sound like a Fall Out Boy song???
> 
>  
> 
> This was difficult to write tbh  
> I had to stop like 4 times just to yell at myself  
> and a few more because I was squealing out of embarrassment

>Be Craig Tucker

>Be at Home

>Be 2pm

. . .

It started snowing again today. It’s probably not going to stop till May.

 

Snow was nice, unlike rain, it was Quiet, Calm, and enjoyable to be in.

 

He was relaxing on his bed, daydreaming when his phone buzzed.

 

*One Message From: Tweekers <3*

 

~

Tweekers <3: hey? Do you want to come over?

You: Uh yea sure? Anything bad happen??

Tweekers <3: uhm not anything specific. I just need company :P

Tweekers <3: I mean if that’s okay with you

Tweekers <3: you don’t have to if you don’t want to

You: Babe

Tweekers <3: were you busy? Did I inconvenience you??

You: Babe.

You: It’s fine.

You: I’m on my way <3

Tweekers <3: oh okay

Tweekers <3: I thought for a second maybe I was being annoying haha

You: No not at all, honey.

Tweekers <3: Are you sure??

You: Positive.

~

I pulled on my jacket and shoved my phone in my pocket.

I thumped down the stairs and made sure to lock the front door behind me.

 

I walked to the Tweak’s residents at a brisk pace. Feet crunching in the fresh snow.

I knocked on the door.

Mr. Tweak opened the door.

“Oh, hello, Craig,” He said in his rich, smooth, mellow voice, in which was in stark contrast compared to Tweek.

“Uh, can I come in?”

“Oh,” He seems almost caught off guard? “Of course,” he moves out of my way and gestures for me to enter.

“Thanks,” I say in a slightly off-put tone.

I climb up the stairs in one rhythmic motion. As I walk down the hall to Tweek’s room, I look at the pictures framed all over the walls. He looks very uncomfortable in almost all of them. All except one. That one was fairly recent, If fairly recent is a year ago. He looks much more at ease. He’s smiling. A genuine smile. I couldn’t even manage a genuine smile in most of my family photos. I remember going to Wal-mart to get this one taken. He had been weening off coffee for almost two months in that photo. That and finally getting put on anxiety meds made him a lot less uncomfortable and able to enjoy his surroundings. I mean, he still begged me to go with him to help calm his nerves. It wasn’t a Big Deal, I could Handle That.

I wondered if his parents even really realized they were the cause of his discomfort for so long. Or if they even cared. This made me mad. How could they do such a thing to such an amazing person? I was standing there in the middle of the hall pondering for far too long. I shook myself out of my haze. Realizing how mad I was, I snickered and shook my head. I continued to Tweek’s room.

I put my hand on the knob very gently, listening very closely for pacing and/or crying. When I didn’t hear anything, I used the knuckle of one finger to knock on the door ever-so slightly. I opened the door haphazardly to see…

 

…Tweek laying on his bed, still in his pajamas, lip-syncing to “Mama” By My Chemical Romance.

I knew he occasionally listened to that sort of thing, hell everyone does on occasion, but jeez, man. He looked up at me and I smiled as he frantically stopped the music and sat up. A light pink crawled onto his cheeks.

“Hey, babe,” I said in a rather up-beat tone.

“H-hey,” He smiled at me awkwardly. I walked up to his bed and promptly sat myself down, scooting closer to him by a few centimeters; If there’s anything I’ve learned, it’s that centimeters matter, Even if you’re just a few too many centimeters away, it will make you seem disinterested. Distance is Everything.

He rested his hand on the bed, in the space between us and I saw this as a window of opportunity to put my hand over his. He made a deep exhale, as if deflating, and leaned onto me, resting his head on my shoulder. Unfortunately for him, our height difference makes it so his jaw almost has to hook onto my shoulder to stay up there. It makes his cheek squish up slightly, making his Freckles stand out much more. He’s just too cute like this. I giggle and kiss him on the head. His hair smells of coffee, pastries, and just a hint of,, lime? Huh.

He giggles lightly at me and crawls up into my lap, pushing our chests together, and wrapping his arms around my neck.

This is probably the position we’d be in if we fucked against a wall. Good to know he’s getting in the practice, but I’m getting off track here.

His head rests on the side of mine and on my neck, is Breathing sends a shiver down my spine. His nose nuzzles into my neck. I pay attention to his breathing, his heart beat, and match mine with his. It’s a calming thing. For both of us if I’m being completely frank.

My hands tangle in his mangy hair as he gives small pecks to my neck. He’s so cute and sweet and-

I yelp.

I pull away, as does he.

He /bit/ me.

He /bit/ my neck.

He blushes furiously. His nose scrunches up in the way it does when he’s embarrassed or upset with himself.

“I-I uh,,” he coughs, “So-orry, I- uhm,,” He pauses. I breathe in, and out as I try to process what just happened.

“It’s o-kay,” my voice cracks, curse puberty, or awkwardness,, or, ugh whatever.

“I- I shouldn’t have done that I uhm- ,, uh- ahg- sorry uh- Kenny told me it was something you do from time to time in a relationship- I uh,” he snickers at himself in pity, “I shouldn’t have listened to uhm him,  -ack, s-sorry uh,”

“That’s a cute gesture but, really, Kenny? Since when did you start taking his advice?” My voice is a sort of lighthearted scolding, but my smirk sends a different message.

“Uh- since-,” he pauses to think, “a- ,,,,, actually that’s a good point-,” he says in defeat. I can’t help but chuckle at how innocent he is. It’s absolutely tooth-rotting.

I pull him closer onto my lap and bump his nose with mine, “Well if you’re going to try something like that you should probably know how to do it,” I look into his curious sea-green eyes as I realize just what’s about to happen. I pray not for this to advance my relationship with sex- which, thus far, has been null, and I’d like to keep it that way. I don’t think he’s ready yet, hell I don’t think /I’m/ ready yet.

I take a deep breath, and as I’m filled with a wave of courage. My lips make contact with his neck and his body stiffens. I know what necks usually lead to- I’ve read my mom’s gross ware-wolf romance novels before- which are gross but informational.

First I make little pecks, then begin with full on kisses. The more I think about it, the more strange the concept of kissing someone’s neck is but, personally, I’m not one to complain. Especially saying the noise that escaped his mouth. That, all on its own, was worth killing millions.

He mewls. I smirk, and breathe. I mumble something along the lines of “I can teach you,” or something of the sort and he stiffens even more, which I previously thought impossible. My fingers traced along his back as I sucked his neck as if I were some sort of fucking vampire. I guess he was into it though, saying as his posture relaxes a noticeable amount. I kiss the bottom of his jaw before returning to the place my lips previously had been slowly sucking the life out of my lovely boy. He shivers and runs his fingers in my hair.

I just have to say it was at this moment I thanked God that I didn’t get a boner.

TMI? Naw. It’s pertinent information, because I’ll tell you something: Boners are hell to deal with. Just saying the word makes me uncomfortable. Just thinking it makes me cringe a little. And if I got one at this moment- my life might as well just be over.

I can feel him smile. He likes this. I’m kinda glad. Otherwise it would be Super Awkward.

I had been working up to this moment- the actual bite. I was ready. It went off without a hitch. But the high pitched squeak that came out of his mouth made the heat rush to my face. His hands balled into fists around my hair. I nuzzled and sucked his neck in a few more places before pulling away, with all of my confidence gone. In it’s place was embarrassment.

The love-struck, embarrassed, dazed, and bright red face of my boyfriend filled me back up with pride instantly. He was just so-

Blown away. You could see it in his dazed smile, and the love-struck boy’s eyes were filled with stars. As he came back down to earth, his face flushed even more, and he covered his face with his hands, quietly screaming into them.

“Just like that,” I stated, confidently. “Now that, my good sir, is how you suck your lovers neck,” I smiled sheepishly, contemplating what just came out of my mouth.

It took him a good minute or two just to get his hands out of his face. My dull blue eyes were filled with passion. He mumbled in an embarrassed panic before taking a deep breath and pulling me in for a very hard, but love-filled kiss. This gesture was quiet out of character. I usually initiated the kisses, but I guess that passion over-rules even the shyest people. He pulls away and giggles happily, as if feeling very accomplished with his actions.

“I-I,” he stuttered, “that was-,” a jittery inhale, “uhm, oh wow,” he says, with an overwhelmed shakiness to his tone.

“y-yea,,” I laughed sheepishly, fiddling with his hands. “that was-“

“Amazing!”

“Bad-,” we both proclaimed at the same time. His face changed from joy to fear and sadness at my words.

“No no no, that was,,, wonderful,, I-,” he was overwhelmed “that was so wonderful, I- I’ve never felt so embarrassed and- and- in love with you, and happy, and fulfilled before,” he smiled shyly and quieted his tone, “It was Nice,,”

The way he said ‘Nice’ sent shivers up my spine and sent me into a bashful tizzy. I giggled like an idiot, drunk off love. Wet smooches and big smiles followed.

“You big dork~” I snorted.

“I love you~” He cooed.

“I love you, too, dum-dum” my voice oozed genuine joy.

 

God I love my super gay boyfriend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter after this one ties right in from this  
> Should upload it in an hour or so
> 
>  
> 
> Let me know if there's any typos hhhh   
> <3


	14. The next day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> dID NO ONE EVER TELL YOU THAT YOUR ACTIONS HAVE CONSEQUENCES  
> CRAIG YOU FUCKED UP  
> B R U H  
> KENNY IS GONNA ROAST YOUR ASS

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm also taking one shot bunny and creek requests now??  
> so mthrfukn hit me up
> 
> -I will not write any details of sex. I can say they /Had/ sex, but i'm not down for any of that "he stroked his ****" because aAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAa  
> I am a p u r e b e a n

Craig knew he was forgetting something as he headed to school on Monday. He just came from the pool. He could have sworn something was off. As he reached the school, he saw Tweek standing on the front steps awkwardly, with an awkward oh-dear-God-help-me face. He waved and frantically gestured me to follow him.

He led me to the bathroom, pulled down the collar of his shirt.

Oh Shit.

Fuck.

We both blushed and gave a oh-fuck-this-is-awkward-what-are-we-gonna-do look.

I took a deep breath and assessed the situation. Okay okay okay. This is fine, this is just fine, everything is Fine.

I rubbed my temple with my hand and brainstormed.

“We could ask one of the girls for a scarf or something?”

“mh,”

“Uhh, we could,, uh, fuck, um,, shit dude, I don’t know,,” I was at a loss. There was nothing we could do.

Tweek, whom was previously leaned against the wall, slid dawn and put his head in his hands, making a mixed groaning, mumbling sound.

“This is so embarrassing,,” he sounded so upset.

“Well, um, I mean, we are a couple, that’s been public since,, 4th grade?”

“4th grade,” Tweek confirms.

“So it wouldn’t be /That/ big a deal,, it’s not like we’re still in the closet or something,,”

“But what if-” I cut him off,

“No ‘but what if’s , it’s gonna be fine, babe. Don’t even worry. Just stay next to me and everything will be fine,” I say sternly but reassuringly.

“mhnm,,” he stands back up and we walk out hand in hand.

…

As the day goes by I think only a handful of people noticed. Some giving reassuring smiles or a thumbs up, and some not drawing any attention to it.

Unfortunately, Kenny happened to be one in the handful.

He teased us at lunch is his slightly perverted, and very much annoying way.

 

“Did you moan?” he prodded, “did youuu,, suck him off?” Tweek of course blushed like mad. All these sexual allegations he could only but have wet dreams about that he would wake up from and probably shower for the next week straight to try to get the filth OUT.

“Aww that’s so cutee,” Kenny cooed like a mother to her baby, “So did you have ~sex~?” He wiggled his eyebrows. That was the last straw. I couldn’t fucking handle it. Flipping him off and telling him to go away wasn’t working. So I punched him.

In hindsight it wasn’t my /Best/ idea, but it did the job. Tweek fussed at me saying that it wasn’t that bad, but that’s the thing, it was that bad. He was borderline harassing us.

 

The principal gave us a stern talking to, but after a while he let us off the hook. Thank God.

Sometimes it’s just too tiring to deal with peoples shit. I’ll admit, I’ve gotten angry, and fed up with Tweek to the point where I had to leave because I was afraid I was going to hit him. And that’s a scary thing. To think about or feel like you’re going to hit the love of your life. It makes me horribly upset just to think about.

I snapped myself out of it and headed to my next class with a split knuckle.

…

Classes were boring, but that wasn’t my main focus.

Tweek was.

Tweek always is.

“Let’s build Stripe a playground!” Tweek exclaimed as we walked to my house. “We can make it out of all the cardboard tubes for him and whatever cardboard is in the recycling bin,”

We put our plan into action. It’s very complicated for a Guinea pig ‘playground’ as Tweek had called it, but Stripe loved it. He ran around and climbed and cooed at us. We watched him in amusement.

“Look at our sOn-,” Tweek’s voice cracks and I laugh.

“Our s o n,” I hold him up like he was Simba from The Lion King.

We laugh and play with him for a good half an hour before we clean up and put the very worn out Stripe back in his cage.

Tweek flopped onto my bed and I flopped down next to him.

We cuddled and he gushed over my split knuckle, almost begging to wrap it up as if I had my finger ripped off.

I had to assure him with a pinky promise that it was Fine.

God he cares so much about me and sometimes it just makes all my insides go !!!!!

We cuddle and talk until his mom calls him to come home. He begrudgingly leaves, not before pecking me on the cheek, of course.

I passed the fuck out. Sleep always came so easy to me, and after that emotionally exhausting day at school, I was worn the fuck out.

I hoped that Tweek slept well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I OFFICIALLY DON'T HAVE ANYMORE CHAPTERS WRITTEN AND I MIGHT TAKE A FEW DAYS TO GET ANOTHER CHAPTER UP BECAUSE I'VE BEEN SUCKED INTO A SLOW-BURN (WHICH IN IT'S DRAFT IS N O T SLOW BURN AAAGGGHH), COFFEE SHOP/COLLEGE AU AND I'M WRITING IT WITH MY LAPTOP, WHICH I SPILLED COFFEE ON LAST NIGHT AND ALMOST BROKE.  
> AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA  
> I'M SO SORRY
> 
>  
> 
> EXPECT MORE OF THIS FIC THOUGH, BECAUSE I'M NOT COMPLETELY OUT OF IDEAS, SINCE MY LIFE IS PRETTY ENDLESS.
> 
>  
> 
> FOLLOW MY TWITTER @Ruby_Can_See_You


	15. Quick A/N

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> sorry sorry

I'm not getting that much positive feedback on this?? I might stop at chapter 25??

Or I'll just not update it as often,,

My other fic ([Coffee, Blondes, and Bets](http://archiveofourown.org/works/12839514/chapters/29316510)) Is getting a lot more attention and love so I'm more motivated to do that? Also this fic is all over the place oops

Expect a chapter today and Thursday

but seriously if y'all don't start commenting n shit I'll probs discontinue >;(((

Ilu <3

 

~Ruby_Rudd (Kyle)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follow my instagram @ruby_rudd  
> Follow my twitter @Ruby_Can_See_You  
> I upload art and cosplays on my insta


	16. ANOTHER SLEEPOVER BECAUSE I'M RUNNING OUT OF IDEAS AND DON'T HAVE FRIENDS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ????  
>  GIVE ME IDEAS F U C K

>Be Tweek Tweak

>Be Very Ready for the weekend

>Be ready to cuddle with his cute boyfriend

…

“It’s almost December, can you believe it??” Clyde exclaimed, Token nodded. “December is the best!” Craig rolled his eyes.

“I’m j-just glad that we get two whole weeks off of school,” I admit, sheepishly.

“Ugh, gross, I hate the two weeks off,”

“Why????” Clyde exclaimed, we look at Craig as if he just grew a third eye,

“It’s too much time to have all to yourself, talk about depression summed up in one thing,”

“Ow, oof, too edgy for me,” Clyde states.

“Yea, yea, whatever,”

I take note as to what he said. Maybe that’s why summer is so scary and difficult for him..

I mentally prepare to cuddle him to death all holiday. Maybe that would help. Gosh sometimes I feel like he’s even more fucked up than me..

The wind is cold and whips through my hair. The four of us walk towards Clyde’s house for a sleepover. Binge watch some movies, play some games, drink, and fall asleep.

Our sleepovers made us out to be alcoholics or something. Getting drunk was just… so fun

It gave us cheap thrills. Like good taste of what college was going to be like.

Upon arriving Clyde’s mom informs us that she’s going to be working late and to not get into any trouble. Clyde always played the innocent card around his mother, and she believed it to an extent.

Clyde’s older sister is at a friends house for a sleepover because “Boys are gross”. I don’t blame her, we are pretty rank.

Clyde’s father hadn’t been in the picture for years. During summer between fifth and sixth grade, his father just left. I guess him mother and father didn’t really have the best relationship. He hadn’t heard from his dad since the night he left. That tore him up inside, and Craig was there to comfort him through it all.

It’s funny and sad how the first thing we did once she was gone was crack into her liquor cabinet.

I’m not one for drinking but…

It’s Nice.

It’s also really funny to see all your friends drunk off their asses.

I still get decently nervous whenever we do it. What if someone found out??

They always reassure me that everyone’s parents would beat their asses and I’d probably just be given longer work hours.

So here we were, drinking in Clyde’s kitchen.

Clyde’s mom was very interesting with her alcohol..

Patronne, really weird vodka none of us had heard of, tequila, rum, gin.

Mostly that sort of stuff.

Clyde and Craig were taking shots of Patronne, Token was being a classy lady and made a Bloody Mary (I think that’s what it was?) and I was drinking this really nice rum.

Don’t tell my friends this but, I really like the way alcohol makes me feel. All warm and tingly inside, and makes me feel so much more… real? Like I’m actually alive. It’s kind of comforting in its own way.

It was around the fifth shot that Clyde threw up, Craig laughed his ass off and declared victory.

Token was drinking like a monster in an extremely classy way. Those two descriptions are contradictive but if you saw, you’d think the same.  He was already working on his third Bloody Mary (?).

I was still just sitting there on the kitchen counter watching these three assholes get out of their mind.

Clyde wondered to the living-room and Token followed to make sure he didn’t set something on fire again.

Craig hopped up on the counter next to me and just laughed at nothing for a whole minute. He wrapped an arm around me and spilled out a bunch of gay shit.

“God, I love you,” he slurred. He was such a happy sappy drunk.

“I love you too, my drunk gay boyfriend,”

He snorted “I’m so fuckin drunk right now, I’m so sorry if I try to pull some crazy shit,”

“You’re fine, babe,”

“God, that’s what I love about you,,” He gushes, “You’re so forgiving and kind,”

I smile as his blushy face contorts to a bashful smile.

It was my turn to gush, “One thing I love about you is when you smile, you don’t do it often enough but when you do you’re too cute,”

“Hnng that’s another thing I like about you, you fuckin squeal at me all the time because I’m ‘so cute’ and ‘Too good for this world’ whenever I smile n shit,” he giggles in a slightly confused but amused tone.

“Because you are!!!” I defend my case, “Your smile makes my heart do back flips and makes my stomach twist like a pretzel!” I huff, embarrassed.

“See, another thing I like about you,” he points out, “The way you get when you’re a little bit mad, you huff and puff and blush like an angry idiot, It’s so wholesome!” He exclaims.

“AcK- you’re too drunk for your own good,” I change the subject, “You’re going to cringe at the memory of this conversation tomorrow!”

“Ehhh, fine,” The stubborn little shit knows I’m right. I smile in satisfaction.

“We should go see what Clyde and Token are doing,” I suggest.

He shrugs and we enter the living room. We see a very VERY drunk Clyde failing at Mario Cart 7 and Token laughing at Clyde.

“You’re literally going the wrong direction!” Token exclaims in between laughing.

“AaAAaUUgHH,” Clyde shrieks while fiddling with the controller, absolutely failing to do anything helpful to his situation. I look at a laughing Craig as he walks over to sit down next to Clyde. I sit on the floor next to Tokens feet.

Clyde continues to fail at Mario Cart 7 for a few more rounds before he rage-quits. He screams while the rest of us laugh at his agony. Token and Craig play a few more rounds. Neither of them are very good, being as inebriated as they are, but Craig gets 4th place almost every time and Token gets 3rd. This makes Craig determined to beat Token, causing at least a few more rounds before giving up. I play one game, I keep falling off the road and declare Token to be the true master. Given, he is probably the least drunk out of us. This is slightly unfair but we got ourselves into this mess, so there’s no paint in blaming Token.

After Clyde’s tantrum of rolling on the floor cursing and screaming, he goes quiet for a few minutes before sitting up with a mischievous smile on his face.

“Heyyyyyyyy guys?”

“What is it this time, Clyde?” Token sighs, knowing that this idea would be a horrendous idea that they follow anyways.

“Sooo my sister is not here, right?”

“Right. What are you getting at?”

“We should play with her makeup..”

“For a guy calling himself as straight as a pole, that’s a pretty odd request,” Token warns, almost mockingly.

“I know but, boys can wear makeup, too. And frankly, I think we’d look good in makeup,” He huffs matter-of-factly.

“I’m down,” Craig sighs.

“Me too,” I admit.

“Seriously??” Token exclaims.

“Yes. Now lets just get this over with so he doesn’t come up with an even stupider idea,” Craig pushes.

“Well I can’t argue with that..”

The four of us collectively run up-stairs and dash into Clyde’s sister’s room.

We stood there while Clyde fished out her makeup bin from the dresser and led us to the bathroom across the hall. Clyde dumped all the makeup onto the counter, causing a loud noise, I saw Craig wince at out of the corner of my eye, and caused much of it to roll on the ground. Classic Clyde. Sometimes I wonder if he even has a brain..

I realize that’s mean and that people might actually think those things about me and start to hate that and so I stop thinking about that.

After cleaning everything off the floor, we organize it into piles. Lipsticks, eyeliners and mascara, face shit, eye shadow.

I don’t know why, but Clyde knows what everything is and how to use it. He shows us the ropes and we all go crazy.

I’m not 100% sure what order everything should be in, so I might have done it wrong. Foundation that hardly matched my skin tone and made my face look cakey, blush, bright red liquid lipstick, chestnut brown eyeshadow, mascara on my bottom lashes. Not for the eyeliner. It was a felt tip liquid eyeliner thing, one swipe on one side, one swipe on the other. Clyde proceeded to scream at me telling me I was the eyeliner god because I got them to both look pretty symmetrical. He forced me to do his, I put a slight curve in his wing, unlike mine which looked straight enough to stab you.

I did the mascara on my top lashes, not without poking my eye, and called myself done.

I watched Clyde and Craig struggle with their makeup as Token had to stop repeatedly to laugh.

In the end, Clyde had dark purple eyeshadow, foundation that looked like cement, the eyeliner I did, really bad mascara that got everywhere on his face, and dark red ‘matte’ lipstick. Token had green eyeshadow, dazzling eyelashes, a little bit of blush, and this really shimmery almost metallic pink lip gloss that looked so good???!? And Craig… well.. oh boy…

He had slightly sloppy blue eyeliner (which was just somewhat darker than the colour of his hat) with really long thick eyelashes (I never realized that they were like that in real life??? I need to pay more attention to him???!?) metallic liquid lipstick, ‘holographic’ ‘highlighter’ on his cheek bones, which made my head spin, as it showed off the build of his face, and bright yellow eyeshadow.

He looked so astro-punk but it looked like he was on crack.

We all stared in awe at each other’s makeup, laughing and calling ourselves the worst drag queens ever.

“This is the gayest shit I’ve done all week,” Craig complains.

“Besides Tweek?” Clyde laughs, knowing our little mutual thing about sex and how we aren’t really ready yet,, but it was funny.

“Besides Tweek,” Craig agrees, jokingly.

 

“Why did we think this was a good idea???”

“We never thought it was a good idea, Token, it’s just what mother fukign happened,” Clyde slurred.

I say this, unable to tell you how shitty we looked, so here’s a picture:

Godwhy.jpg

We looked atrocious and we didn’t care.

As we shoved all the makeup and shit back into the bin, we laughed about how stupid we looked and Craig washed it off, leaving a waking-up-after-a-break-up sort of makeup induced dark circles under his eye.

We decided that it was time to play some movies, so we all scurried down-stairs and watched a bunch of movies I don’t particularly like. We watched Con-air, and a bunch of other Nicholas Cage movies. I actually never really understood the plot of Con-air?? It never really processed in my brain.

We took too many selfies to count, most of them being incredibly blurry. Uploading them to our social medias. Typical cyber-teen shit.

We looked like a huge mess, in a small house, in a small town, but we didn’t care.

Clyde kept commenting about Nic. Craig kept pointing out logical loops, mistakes, and other stupid shit in the movies, which made Token very frustrated.

At some point Clyde brought in a shit ton of popcorn and chocolate and we all practically inhaled it. When he got doritos later in the night, he kept them close to him, shooting us glares whenever we looked at the bag of chips.

“Don’t even think about it,” he threatened.

“Alright, alright, step off,” Token said, holding his hands up in defeat.

The whole experience was so meta.

I was so tired, and drunk. Everyone was so drunk. Half the time I couldn’t even tell if it was real. I kept snapping myself out of it and going ‘Wait this is real?? This is my life??? Wowza???’ and falling back into the watching-yourself-but-not-being-able-to-control-yourself. I was too intoxicated to care, but otherwise I’d be freaking out.

As the night (or probably morning at this point) continued, we got more and more tired.

Clyde was the first to fall asleep. He fell asleep next to an empty bag of doritos and a dumb movie playing in the background. Craig laughed at the fact that Clyde looked so stupid when he slept and that he was superior to Clyde for being about to stay up longer.

Craig passed out shortly after Clyde (Oh the irony). Token fell asleep around the same time I did, but I didn’t really notice at the time. I had washed my face off (because I don’t want to suffocate my skin cells!!!) and snuggled up to my sleeping boyfriend. He was curled slightly and looked uncomfortable. Given, the ground isn’t a wonderful place to sleep, even though we tolerate it far too often. I wrap my arm around my dumb, drunk, cute boyfriend’s waist and throw a blanket on top of us.

I’m so dozed off that out of the edge of my conscience I can hear the TV turn off and someone get comfortable. I now can infer that it was Token, but at the time it didn’t really register.

I feel Craig shift slightly, moving closer to me, his hand grabs and balls up the edge of my shirt. He’s so cute. I kiss his stupid little soft cheek.

I fall asleep thinking about my cute space man.

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ??!?!?!?!?!?!  
>  Get ready for an out of character, weak chapter on thursday   
> oof


	17. short, ooc, out of ideas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'm out of ideas, this is short, and ooc  
> Give me ideas  
> I'm out of chapters

Hangovers are horrible. Especially when you’re underage and can’t just openly complain about it.

That’s a terrible thing to say, isn’t it?

No matter, I wake up before everyone else.

Tweek is curled up against me. He’s so cute??? I love my small gay boyfriend.

I lay there for a little longer as not to disturb my coffee bean and pet his hair.

After a while I get up to take a piss and get some cereal. I sit down on the floor next to Tweek with my cereal and munch quietly. I pet his hair in between bites of sugary cancer. Token wakes up shortly afterwards. He fixes himself a bowl of cereal and scrolls through his twitter feed until Clyde wakes up. He munches on cold poptarts (ew) and watches cartoons on TV. Tweek wakes up about an hour after the rest of us have awoken.

This is a bit out of character but I’m just glad he’s getting the rest he needs.

He wakes up enough to crawl into my lap and falls back to sleep. I pet his hair and watch cartoons. Eventually Token leaves to go do a AP US History assignment. Tweek eventually wakes up and I walk him home.

He’s blushy and sluggish.

“Alcohol didn’t treat you that well, huh?”

“Guess not,” he snickers. I cover him in my jacket.

I quietly get him up to his room and he crawls back into bed. I kiss him on the forehead and scroll through the laptop I gave him.

Checking tumblr, twitter, the usual shit.

I snicker at Wendy roasting Cartman for the fifth time this week on Coonstagram.

Her insults are surprisingly original. Shit like “Daft Cunt”, “Idious maximus”, “Hitler’s ballsack”, “Square fag”, “Hot Pocket neck”, and so many other brilliant insults.

I’m left in awe at her literate genius.

I message her

~

Craig_Fucks_Space: You’re fucking brilliant

Wendlez: ?

Craig_Fucks_Space: your insults bring tears to my eyes

Craig_Fucks_Space: like WOW

Craig_Fucks_Space: it’s so beautiful

Wendlez: thx dude

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ?


	18. eyy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> oops

i know i said i'd never run out of ideas but i did oops

you guys can make requests n shit for this but idk where this series is going anymore

this was my first attempt at writing in this fandom and i'm getting better

i'd suggest you check out my series Coffee, Blondes, and Bets if you like this

that one is so much better

 

sorry guys :(

just give me ideas!!!


	19. The end

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was inevitable

Huge let down

 

I've lost interest with this fic

I don't have friends

or a life

so idek what to write about anymore

go check out something I'm actually proud of

[Coffee, blondes, and bets](http://archiveofourown.org/works/12839514/chapters/29316510)

[Groupchat nerds](http://archiveofourown.org/works/12863391/chapters/29379144)

[South Park Drabble series](http://archiveofourown.org/series/878454)

 

 

This fic is yucky and I might abandon it

 

It's super cringy

 

sorry

sorry


End file.
